John L.

July 20, 2010 @ (Orlando)

Tags: 8 year dream


I was with a girl for 7.5 months. When we first met she told me that she was going to try and get back together with her ex.8 years earlier I had begged God to show me the girl I was to marry. I had seen this girl and her dad for 8 years in my dreams and had been looking every day. 2 days before my 23 b-day,I took her out to dinner and it was my first date.We ended up hanging out more and more. FOund out later she was with a guy I knew and was having sex. I am a true Christian and wanted to show her that sex wasn't how you loved someone it was just being with the that mattered most. Her ex had messed up her head. I got drunk for the first time forher and apparently I woke up next morning with no clothes on. I lost my virginity.To me it was the most sacred thing I wanted to give my wife to say this is all that I am and I am giving it to you. We ended up doing it a lot and I thought she would stay with me. She was talking with her ex the whole time and I hated that but was trying to show I cared. He came back 4 two weeks and she had sex with him. I had just given her a 200 dollar pair of earrings saying the night before don't forget about me. She came back and we were together for a few months then she started working at a place full of guys then the there was no contact with her. I was like what the crap. She didnt tell me anything. I had nightmares of me being in the room while she was having sex with a guy I had never seen. Later found out she was seeing a guy from work. And that she had finally broken up with her ex.
I said is there any way that we could start over since she now had a clear head. No. She never once loved me or had feelings for me. They were all transferred from her ex to me. Sorry.
In the end I gave my virginity so she wouldn't go to another guy who would use her for sex,gave her my heart, mind, body and soul. I waited 8 years for this girl and she took everything and said it meant nothing. Now I am afraid to even ask a girl out because I believed in her. One time after sex she was like what is your favorite part. aka on her body. I pointed to her heart. I never wanted sex. I kept telling her it was just holding her hand, being in her arms, and looking into her eyes that made me forget everything. Now I fear she is destroying her future. All I can do is pray


       


 

Comment on this breakup






angela

August 25, 2012


who said anything of naked photos perve! i was just thinking the person would need a friend!! your an ass


     


Maury

August 25, 2012


fuck off...


     


Maury

August 25, 2012


fuck off...


     


Maury

August 25, 2012


fuck off...


     


Maury

August 25, 2012


fuck off...


     


Maury

August 25, 2012


bite me but who the heell are you? we do not need crap shit ike this w/ half nude photo... god shall punish, u will reign my firend. that fucking worm bitch bastard


     


angela

August 25, 2012


Text me and i'll make u feel better 8164381646


     


Chris

August 10, 2012


You need to see a therapist, dude.


     


John L

August 10, 2012


Something I forgot and don't know how. I asked her at 4 months if she ever had a wedding dream? She said she did in highschool (same time when mine started) I said could you describe it. She described a church with lots of woodwork, large stained glass windows, an alter with 3 or 4 steps, and a red rug in the back center aisle. Without knowing it she had described my home church I grew up in down to the red rug with black rubber trim in the center aisle. Then she said there was a man standing there on the stage on the right corner with blonde hair but she could not see his face because a light was shining it out. If you read the previous about my wedding dream she just said where I was standing in my wedding dream and when I saw her for the first time her face was blinded out by light. Thus the reason why I said you have a heart inside you that shines brighter than a star. With this I am finally done.


     


John L.

August 09, 2012


While there was more this is all that I believe needs to be said. I ask now that those who read this story learn from my mistakes and maybe how to treat a girl or guy better. This shattered me and my dreams.I am still rebuilding. I pray that all of you find who you are looking for in life and please don't ever hurt them like this just because you can. Please don't comment on this just read through it. The End