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I Fell Out Of Love (The Scariest Thing You Can Do)

March 12, 2017 @ (U.S)

Tags: So sad it\'s almost funny, sad break up, don\'t cry while reading this,


When you read this story, I am certain you're going to think I am an idiot, But I promise if you give it a read, it will all tie together.

When I was 15 (he was 14), I thought I met the love of my life. We did everything together. I grew up dating him essentially all of high school. For reference, we are in the same grade. I experience so much of my life, shared everything with him.

You could say that over the course of almost 4 years of dating, we became inseparable. The inside jokes, the traditional dates, the teasing, the flirting, we had something special. But of course, over the last year of dating, the fighting only got worse. We had also been known to have a few huge fights here or there, but in all honesty, fighting is okay. But it came to a point for me that I realized I had simply had enough, I was tired of arguing with him. I was exhausted from telling him that he shouldn't ignore me, or that he should actually want to see me more.

He never was overly affectionate towards me during the last year. It had seemed that we were two ships that could not stop one storm after the next. On our 3.5 year anniversary, he asked to take a break because he had been so tired of me. He cut off all communication with me for days. I was devastated. I couldn't think or sleep. I had never felt more crushed. However, when he came to my doorstep with flowers and an apology, I felt like he had changed.

And he did. He wanted to plan our dates, talk to me more, call me, anything. It was one of the best points of my relationship, those few months. However, it wasn't enough, because to me, something was missing. I didn't love him anymore. I can't express to you what it feels like to wake up one morning, and you see this person you've always loved, but you feel different. I had fallen out of love. When I chose to break up with him, after taking a week of a break to clear my head.

He was devastated. I had hurt him so much, and it wasn't something I could help him with. Because I did that. But I could never force myself to love someone when I did not. Over the next months, we were friends. We did not want to hate each other, or be like every other ex. So we were close friends. He had made me agree that we shouldn't date for the rest of the school year, that way it would be easier on us. So I agreed. I figured, it was the least I could do, right?

Then, I found out he had been dating a girl. The worst part, was it was a girl he spent my entire relationship telling me he hated. So I assumed she was never a threat. The pain I felt/feel is the most intense sadness I could have ever felt. It's comparable to the time he didn't know if he loved me. I didn't eat right or sleep well for almost an entire week. Nothing has hurt me more.

In fact, I am still hurt because of the recency of this, as I type this, I have been tear filled, dry throat, and head throbbing. I think what is sad, was for the first time in a long time, I was starting to feel like I had missed him, and I was going to tell him that week, but then I found out he was dating someone else. The most unfortunate about all this, is I lost not only a boyfriend in this entire process, but now I have lost a friendship. We don't talk anymore. I dearly hope that will change, because he doesn't know the magnitude of how hurt not only I feel, but the rest of his friends, because suddenly, none of us exist. What hurts is I will never stop caring about him, no matter how much I hate him for the moment, I will always care. But now I have never felt more devastated. I want to tell myself I deserve it for breaking up with him, but I wasn't happy dating anymore. Do I deserve this?


       

Anonymous Gal

March 01, 2017 @ (Singapore)

Tags: #breakup


When I was in university, I went on exchange overseas. Being a shy and quiet girl, I was prepared to spend the 4 months there alone by myself and doing things independently. Perhaps, god loves to spoil your plans because I ended up spending almost all my time with a boy from another country that I met there. I don't usually get along easily with people but somehow we just clicked and I really enjoyed his company. Though it wasn't by any means official, he started treating me the way you would your girlfriend. He sweet-talked me by calling me the "prettiest girl", persuading me to run errands for him, and I started to think something was amiss because it appeared that he was spending all his time when he was not with me, with another girl. I started to be very skeptical and suspicious of him though I had already fallen for him. Soon I noticed that this girl appeared to be runniing the errands he asked me to run for him.
Then she mocked me with him one day and making it very clear that she didn't want him or herself anywhere near me, when I met up with him later that day... He pretended like nothing had happened and even asked me to accompany him one on one to day trips to various tourist destinations. One day, he even asked me out and tried to persuade me into entering a sexual relationship with no strings attached. I was shocked because I was a very good girl who never had a boyfriend and I had never heard of anything like that. He dropped the idea perhaps knowing he had gone too far. I started to plan to dump him.
We had already signed up for two tours together to see some interesting sights so I planned to dump him after the tours. I made up my mind not to have anything to do with him.
It would have ended like that but no, he started messaging me and asking me out again. I told him straight in the face my issues and highlighted to him that "I may like him" because of the way he behaved. He had the cheek to act like he was attracted to me. Staring deeply into my eyes and telling me to "chase him, buy him something"
I obviously would not do that.
He and his other girlfriend were as close as ever and mocking, intentionally avoiding me when together refusing to sit with me in the dining hall.
I decided to try my best to find out what was going on. Was he cheating on, doing things behind my back he knew would hurt me and lying to me? I asked him if he was together with the girl. He denied it vehemently.
Finally, the day when it all ended came. We were friends on MSN and I decided to prank him in a final effort to find out the truth. I mock-pretended that I was truly heartbroken to fool him in hope of him telling me the truth that he had been doing things behind my back. Instead, he replied me by telling me I was never his friend and that he could not be bothered should anything happen to me. He denied that he had said those stuff previously and said that he said some of them to intentionally hurt my feelings. I was outraged!
Recently, I found out he was getting married to that girl. He had been lying, cheating on me outright. I had no buisiness to be his girlfriend, I entered his life wanting to be his friend because we could get along. He was the one who started behaving like I was his girlfriend. He did things behind my back that he knew would hurt me but he still did it. I have no words for such a disgusting jerk.


       

Dammie

February 26, 2017 @ (Ec)

Tags: Bad breakups , sad break ups


Me and my ex , we met 5 years ago we were so in love , was the first time in my life I had boyfriend ( I was 22 y.o ) he treated me like no other ever... I was facing depression and he took me out of it ... after almost 2 years , he texted me saying he was getting enough of me and that he didn't loved me anymore wasn't the first time ,I did begged him before not to leave me anyways he did I was in a terrible depression for over 3 months I didn't almost left my house or my room I cried all the time he then texted me saying he wanted to remain friends I said yes because I still had feelings for him , he sometimes talked about a girl saying was like hypothetical situation . A month later I found out he was dating ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS , i couldn't believe it everything made sense then she never apologized he didn't told me into my face either , cried and yelled to him the pain I was experiencing became unbelievable, after a month he texted me again saying sorry and all and that he was having a really bad time with his family and needed me , at first I sent him to hell but because I'm so stupid I kept contact and tried to help him out 4 months later he was having issues with his current gf ( my ex friend) and turned still to me saying that he understood now who really loved him , to make it short we came back together I forgave him but things weren't that great since I was all the time afraid that he might cheat again he was patient but sometimes he wouldn't pick the phone and it rang as occupied very late at night . He would go freaking mad if i would quise took him about it ,he kept saying I was being crazy that he was sleeping as always I apologized all the time we went on a wonderful trip to Asia and was wonderful , after that I made some decisions of my career that he didn't liked much but accepted , he travelled a lot because of his job , I even fought him looking for prostitutes when he was in Vietnam , to which he said I was being mental because he didn't do anything and I was going through his privacy , i always caught him trying to talk to other woman and was exhausting ,he cried and everything so I decided to believe him always , so I gave up and became that kind of woman that he could yell at and say I was stupid , that kind of woman that couldn't be angry because he didn't replied in 7 hours but he could be mad at me for not doing it in 10 minutes , I was being called stupid ,asshole etc etc every time I tried to ask about something .... one day we fought so badly that we didn't talked for 1day , I felt the end coming and felt pity for myself I loved him so much but I cried every single day and couldn't do anything in any other aspect of my life , I texted him finally being so afraid telling him that he could decide our future since he last words to me were "I want to break up with you so many fucking times but I don't say it" I told him I would do what he decides ,fight one more time or end ... he asked me time to think , 2 days later or silent I asked him ,he said was hard that he loved me but he made me cry and sometimes he didn't even felt bad about it ... anyways he broke up and broke my heart for second time...
Now one month later , i get to know that he is talking to another girl , younger prettier... and even I was doing okay and slowly not crying for him . I went back to the pain of the first time we broke up , that pain in your chest that won't go , the feeling of the tears going down your face without you even noticing, because I still love him and miss him like I did almost 5 years ago


       

EponaSaysHai

February 22, 2017 @ (Covina, CA)

Tags: Worst break up ever


I fell in love with my best friend. He was a sweet and kind boy that loved to help people. And he loved me back. I knew he did because he treated me like I was special. He said things that no one who saw you as just a friend would say. 4 months of magical romance that everyone saw but we didn't want to admit was there. Finally one day we told each other how we felt and all our friends were so happy for us. I had never been happier in my life. We loved each other. At first it was cute puppy love, I guess you could say, but when my growing depression finally got ahead of me, we found out how much we truly loved each other. He cared for me unlike anyone I've known. The puppy love became a romance and passion that we had building up inside of us for months. We were completely in love with each other even if we both hated ourselves. We were each other's reasons for living. And I can't tell you how many times we were so close to giving up but saved each other. I'll never forget that day I wanted to kill myself and he told me that he loved me and I meant everything to him. That I changed his life for the better. That summer, 3 months after we first confessed to each other, was depressing because we missed each other dearly. School was the only time we got to see each other. Then one day I got my phone taken away. The only way I could contact him was through text. For 2 weeks I sometimes secretly went in my phone to text him. It was brief but those moments were everything to me. Then... 5 days after our 5 month anniversary, I got my phone back. I texted him happily and he replied. But he was depressed. I asked him why and he refused to tell me. I hadn't talked to him in 3 days at the time so anything could've happened. I finally got him to tell me what was wrong and he said.... "I think I'm gay..." I was in shock. And when he said he liked me as a friend, I wanted to throw my phone and just kill myself. I struggled to stay calm for his sake. If I showed how much it hurt, he would regret telling me even more. I told him I needed to be alone. I was in public, totally unprepared for any tragic news. But slowly as reality sunk in, I couldn't hold back against the tears that threatened to pour. I excused myself to the restroom where I cried so hard I couldn't breathe because I tried to stay quiet. I didn't feel anything but pain and sadness. For the next few weeks, he begged me to move on. He was extremely sad and was angry at himself for breaking my heart. He even said he wish had never said anything at all. But I would've found out one day. He wouldn't love me anymore and I would be able to tell. School started and we were friends who pretended we were fine. No one asked about our relationship. Only one person did but we ignored them. It's funny. A lot of people keep asking us if we are dating. No one asked when we actually were. He isn't the same anymore. He isn't positive anymore. He shuts down when he's sad and only talks to his therapist. He used to talk to me. I dont know what we are at the moment. Sometimes I see my boyfriend again in the way he looks at me. Sometimes I see my best friend. But sometimes I see my ex boyfriend, the broken shell of the person I once knew and loved. I still love him to this day.

If you ever hear about a break up where the boyfriend finds out he's gay and the girlfriend is sad, don't laugh. It sounds humorous, but when it becomes your reality and the thing that tears you apart everyday, you won't be laughing. In these cases, there's little to no chance of getting back together. And it hurts like hell.


       

Dont Wanna Say..

February 11, 2017 @ (USA)

Tags: bad break up need advice help me


my ex and i dated for about two months and we recently broke up Monday of this week (2/6/17). I experienced true love for the first time in my life. I thought of him as the most amazing person i had ever laid eyes on. Since the beginning of the relationship, we grew up a lot. We started dating when we were 15 years old. and we are now 17. I did so much for him, i paid for the majority of dates, gave him money because he would need it and i constantly prioritized him, putting him before everything. I let him come between my family and friends. He was my first, i lost my virginity to him a year ago on valentines day. he did many things that were bad in the beginning of the relationship but i managed to hang on to the relationship because he begged and pleaded for me to stay. Now i am broken. I have a 4.7 GPA , i can get into any college i want to in North Carolina, i have an amazing job making great money and a great family and an awesome bestfriend. But i can't be happy without him. I feel like i absolutely need him in my life to feel okay. I really have put my happiness on the backburner for him. For months he has been canceling plans for friends and he would sleep through our plans bc he was out super late the night before, i felt like i wasnt important and he would be really mean when i tried to talk to him about it, calling me needy and saying "why can't u just be understanding and say okay sometimes" he would yell at the top of his lungs and blame the fact that he had no nicotine and thats why he was being that way to me. He doesn't go to school anymore (so a drop out) spends every dime on his truck making me have to pay for his food and gas and dates. he never treated me right yet he broke up with me monday and blocked me on everything. i begged and pleaded for him to stay for 2 days then i went no contact on him and havent spoken since wednesday to him. i know for a fact that he loves me. i just want him back. i think i have learned a lot about myself and i have been through more pain than i can begin to describe. Will he come back to me? our connection when we were together was so strong. this boy literally has our date tattooed on his wrist and he had given me a promise ring promising me forever. help me someone please just give me advice. i need to know if you think he will come back or not. how can you spend 2 years with someone to drop them this way?


       

Kristi

January 31, 2017 @ (NY)

Tags: shitty breakup


This was my first time dating a guy. I'm a softmore in high school and he is a senior. Throughout highschool I talked to many different guys but I was always ending up being used. TBH it's hard to come around a respectful guy and I bet you all are aweare of that... anyway, out of the blue I started dating this guy and I had never felt happier in a relationship with someone. Even though I am still very young, through him i found out how I should really be treated and respected. He was my bestfirend and i felt so open and free with him , I never knew someone like him existed. Saying that sounds cliche but he was definitely a big part of my life. We dated for 6 months, which very much impressed me because i usually get over a guy fast! 2 days befor Halloween, I felt very strange about our relationship. He always had work and I got fed up with not being able to be with him all the time.. I didn't know how to handle my anger, so I asked for a break. I knew I was loosing feelings, not all to do with him, but more so the timing was awful. he was also leaving to collage soon. I just felt a little heartbroken. I knew he cared about me very much, when I told him I wanted a break he cried and that was so strange to see because i never had a guy cry over me. We loved eachother one day but the next i just couldn't be in the relationship any longer. He resipricated by telling me he doesn't want a full commitment beucase he's a senior and maybe we can get back together later if the timing is right. It sucked to hear but I knew he was right. He wanted to belive we could be friends, but at that time I felt as if the rest of his party life as a senior was the most important thing to him. We broke up on Halloween night, the day after we said all of this too eachother. He knew I wanted to break up with him BUT HE WOULDNT LET ME. I think it was somthing to do with his pervious relationship when his X broke up w him due to the same reason. So yep Halloween night he texted me a shitty breakup text saying he wants his independence . that made me so much more attached knowing i couldn't have him. We talked a little as friends after but we both agreed if we would ever want to get back together we can't be friends. I haven't talked to him for 2 months now and I don't know how i have made it this far , all I know is I deserve better , but I miss my best friend. Knowing our past and how alike we are , I somtimes do belive we will get back together but i never want to hurt myself again. What is your opinion on this type of breakup and any advice ???


       

Lucy

December 06, 2016 @ (North Carolina )

Tags: Bad


We were together for 3 years and we just grew distant. I hadn't seen him all summer and when I do he just acts like we were never together. So I had to spend every day with him because my dad and his dad hung out. I watched him flirt and be with other girls. I balled my eyes out every night because of him. I guess I just was living in the past and I need to move on with my life. One thing is I will forget our memories and him but I will never forget the lesson he taught me.


       

Kyra

December 03, 2016 @ (Uk)

Tags: #brokenheart


My name is kyra, I was with my boyfriend for year we broke up about a month ago. He was obsessed with me, I thought he would never leave and it cut me like a knife when he walked out of my life. I can't eat, l can't sleep, I have no ambition what so ever! My heart is physically broken, I don't know if I'm going to survive this. I can't imagine life without him forever or him being with someone else, it makes me physically sick!!! Getting out of bed is a struggle everyone morning, the pain is unbearable; the big whole in my heart keeps getting bigger. My life feels like it's over, l feel like I will never be happy and content again! Nothing can ever fix this l just want to end it all. I can't be here anymore, l can't do this, l can't survive this. Someone please help me!!


       

Erick Lopez

December 01, 2016 @ (Arlington VA)

Tags: #badbreakup #dumped


I dated my ex 5 times through 6-7th grade. I'll call her Alex for sake. She asked me out and I said yes. The next three days were the best of my life I loved her kisses and her hugs were the sweetest things ever. But one day she texted me saying "Erick, I need to tell you something". This obviously got me nervous. She said "I lost feelings for you" That hurt by itself but the worst part was that she said she found feelings for someone else. That killed me. She played with my feelings so professionally.


       

The Unstable Entrepenour

November 21, 2016 @ (United States)

Tags: Bad Breakup


I remember that it hurt. Hearing the words hurt - and at the same time, it felt like something out of a movie, like it wasn't happening. After all, how could it? It had been merely a week since our second anniversary, and as an anniversary gift she had given me a card that said, "I promise to be with you for all the years to come."
I couldn't even begin to process it. "How do you feel," she asks me, trying to decipher my off smile and my wondering eyes. I only smile because I don't know what to say, what to feel. I don't fight it, I merely say all-right, shed a couple tears, and drop her off at her house. It took me a couple days for my emotions to catch up with me - and oh boy, did they come in force. Like a thousand crashing waves, every single negative emotion in the book comes, all at once, all clamoring for my attention in a sea of deprecating voices: "you weren't enough," "she got tired of you," "you aren't good enough for anyone" ; and as I struggle to get them in check, I was still left wondering: why exactly did it happen?
I never got a straight answer to that question; at least, none that I understood. She mentioned that she wanted to try being with a girl (she's bi, but not in practice yet), that I had been insensitive about one fight that we had more than a year ago, that I was too unstable in my life for her to think about settling down with me. "If my ex had asked me to move in with him, I would've done it in an instant" she said. Surprisingly enough, her life wasn't in any way better than mine: a education major working as a cashier at one of the lowest paying grocery shops in the area, with no car telling me, a computer engineering major with a car, and a delivery job earning 2.5x more per hour as her.
While I could see how she was right, since I had been thinking about dropping out of school, and I had changed my major more than three times in the last six months, I just didn't understand why that was an issue now, all of a sudden. The only answer I can come up with is that perhaps the spark, that magical, elusive feeling that binds people together just died over time for her, while mine grew stronger and stronger. While she was thinking about how to break the news to me, I was thinking what would be the best date to travel to Disneyland with her, since she had told me not too long before, that she'd like me to propose to her at the Cinderella Castle.
I write this now, two months later, even thought it feels like a lifetime ago. My speculating and unstableness paid off after all; because I was willing to take risks, I dropped out of school, and started working in Real Estate. In the first month, I rose from Intern to District Manager at a local firm, and when some shady situations came to light regarding the owners, I left the firm, and opened my own. I'm earning four times what I was before, and it'll only grow from here. Even so, I still look back and wonder what could've been. When she ended things, it felt like someone had taken a hammer to the glass sculpture that was my future with her; and even though I'm not crying over it anymore, I have yet to pick up the pieces, and start again.