Searching for "feelings"

147 Results For 'feelings'

David Pheng

October 10, 2016 @ (Cambodia)

A month ago, I was deeply in love with this sweet tough guy whom I nicknamed him "Blueberry". The relationship we had was like an electromagnetic force turned into flames and sparks, although sadly it only lasted for a month. It all started in the late summer and ended in the early monsoon. It was the kind of love that was unexpected and overwhelming, and we had no idea why we ended up falling in love at first sight. Meh, you wouldn't believe me, right? Yup, I wouldn't believe myself, either.

I had always thought that the idea of being in love at first sight was "foolish" until it happened to me. He was brave enough to hold my hand, walking in the pouring rain and whispering to me that he'd never met someone like me before. At that blissful moment, I caught him looking and smiling at me dazzlingly, laughing like a little kid. Oh, you know what? His smile was infectious; his deep husky voice kept me interested in whatever he talked about; and his large and tall body kept me safe and warm. I knew he also liked me...and I was happy.

Time passes; feelings change; memories fade; people leave but hearts never forget. We broke up out of the blue. It hurt like hell when he told me he tried to make the relationship work but it didn't, because he made me fall so deep in love with him. It was the moment I knew I'd just lost a soulmate whom I could talk to for hours without any pretense, laughing at his jokes without acting like he was a funny guy (because he was one hell of a funny guy) and sharing secrets to each other. I felt like I'd lost someone more than a close friend, although we only spent a month together. We'd had plans to be done and promises to be made until we found out that we weren't meant to be together in the end.

I would be lying if I said that I was fine going through the breakup...but I guess, it was okay, because I kept reminding myself that all I've always wanted is for him to be happy even if I'm not the cause of his happiness. The combination of anger, guilt, and revenge built up inside me has finally subsided. I admit I was so mad and depressed, leaving him numerous messages and calls...because I wanted him to be there when my heart was broken and fire was burning inside me. I couldn't sleep and eat well for several weeks; I lost some pounds; I looked up "how to mend a broken heart" articles on the internet, yet they couldn't help much as my heart still wanted what it wanted, although my head tried to prevent me from going back to what'd shattered my heart into pieces. The funny thing was I even cried at work when he instantly popped up inside my mind.

Buried deep inside my head, his presence was still there. I saw the invisible him every where we used to go together. As much as I tried to erase him from my mind, I only kept hurting myself by doing so. It took like a month to get better from it. However I'm in the process of healing my heart and bringing back the old happy me, deep down inside I still miss him and wish him all the best. I love him. I still do. But I'm letting him go if that's what makes him happier. Thanks for all the memories which will be kept and locked forever in my heart.

Stephen King once said, "Some birds are not meant to be caged, that's all. Their feathers are too bright, their songs too sweet and wild. So you let them go, or when you open the cage to feed them they somehow fly out past you. And the part of you that knows it was wrong to imprison them in the first place rejoices, but still, the place where you live is that much more drab and empty for their departure."

Ivy

October 08, 2016 @ (India)

Tags: Sad, Guilty, Bad, Break up, His Once Baby

He was my 1 year senior friend. That night he said he liked me. Idk if I had feelings for him or not. But my best friend said that he's a really good guy and that I should approve his proposal. And yes, I did. But as I said I didn't know that if I had feelings for him that's why I didn't say romantic words as I know it's not good being superficial. But after 3 months I confessed that I truly loved him Yeah he waited those 3 months for me. All went quite good the next 3 months. I was his Baby/Babe/Bae/Love. He loved me a lot. But then something happened and he wanted to break up. I didn't want to force him so I agreed. But the next day he said that he can't leave me and again I agreed. Actually we never met face to face properly. After a few weeks after final exams he stopped talking to me but I called him and everything was back to normal. The next month he went thousand miles away from me to another state. He had asked me to call him everyday before he went. But after he went there he didn't text properly. Talked weird and like he didn't want to talk. As a result I didn't call or text him. After 3 months he texted me that he was missing me. Even I did so. That's why I accepted him. But nothing was normal. I felt awkward an all stuff. We had a fight. He did apologize but I was not cool at all. I replied rudely. So he said "let's break up". I replied Affirmative. But then I realized I can't do without him. I texted a long message with an I love you at the end. He said he was confused and that he would reply After Some days as his exams were approaching. Today he texted that he didn't know what I feel but wanted to be out of this totally. I agreed but bashed at him. Bombarded him with rude words and at last congratulated for his new girl. He thanked me. I thanked him For teaching me that all guys are the Same. He said "mention not'. And blocked me on all social networks.
That's how it all ended.
I wanna get over him now. But I feel bad that I talked that rudely.

Noname

October 03, 2016 @ (india)

Tags: bad

I met her last month through instagram we had lot of fun together we talked and laughed. She was really something to me i knew that she felt the same to me, But we didn't had a phone call yet just because i was not comfortable or prepared to talk her i need time.Then she said it's okay you can take your time and call me!!!!!!!
You know guys, Everything happens just because a phone call!!!
I took more time to call her and i didn't do that yet.
Yesterday she asked me to call her and talk to her she can't wait anymore its like so hard to love someone who are not comfortable with talk over phone, and i said give me some more time and i am gonna call you today, it was over my head i felt so obsessed and i was like pressuried to talk her bocause it was my very first time to gonna talk someone like this, but she didnt get that, anyway i dont wanna blame her everybody have their own feelings i need to consider her feelings too,
She said i was like, make her an idiot.
and i said i am gonna call you now she said she dont want to talk to me anymore she pissed off!! if i call her she will fight me and be rude. After a long converstaion she said goodbye!!
Fuck***
I dont know what to say
She really need to say goodbye to me??
Yeah!! she really need that, i can understand her feelings...
Everything gonna endup!!
Just because of my stupidity
I am a big fool in this world
I really dont need her to say goodbye
But everything has already ended up!!
Fine!
Coool!!
I am fucked up!!
If i hurt you please dont despise me!!
I still need you happy!!
Stil i can love you!!
I dont know what the fuck*** am i!!!

JoHeartBroken

June 29, 2016 @ (West Virginia)

Tags: gay, heartbroken, sad breakup

He was my stepbrother's friend, having moved in with us two years ago. He never showed any signs of liking me--or men in general--at all. In fact, I always thought he was a bit homophobic until he told me otherwise. He said, "As long as you don't like me." Well, of course, I kind of fell for him. I never told him, but I always tried to underhandedly flirt with him. I wasn't sure if he knew how I felt about him. Then, just this past weekend, I caught him looking at me and smirking. I asked why he was looking at me like that. He said, "Nothing." I then asked him if he knew how I felt about him. He sat down and grabbed my hand and asked if this was what I wanted. It was such a great feeling, being with him. Then he tells me that he'd had feelings for me since he first got to know me, but he never did anything because his dad was super homophobic and would literally kill him. Then he tells me he's leaving for a job in Virginia, so we couldn't be together anymore. It wasn't until two weeks from now, but he got kicked out due to bad blood between he and my stepmother. I'm completely heartbroken, and it's all I can think about.

Anonymous

May 03, 2016 @ (Fredonia, NY)

Tags: none

broke up with my boyfriend of about 2 years but we live together with our friends until my semester end and i go home for the summer. Well we decided to be friends with benefits. I am aware that this is a really bad idea but I was hopeful because the last time we broke up we were fwb and got back together. It's been about 2 to 3 weeks we have been fooling around and the other day he kissed me and asked if I was ok with it. At first I thought we were getting back together since this was exactly what happened last time only he still wanted to be fwb. Lately we have been kissing a lot but only at night when everyone else goes to bed but he seems to kiss me really passionately and caresses my face and is very sensual with me. Not only that but he does little things like ruffle my hair to show me affection. I still love him very much and I want more should I talk to him about this? I'm scared he's going to say no and we won't be fwb because I love being able to touch him or do you think he has feelings for me but is scared of getting back into a relationship? I know this post is long and annoying and I'm sorry but I really would love some advice on what to do!!!

Deanna

March 16, 2016 @ (ny)

Tags: Broken Heart

Before I share my story just a quick history. I had a 3 year relationship in high school i fell out of love then I met Erik and i was head over heels for about 8 months little dod I know he had feelings for his ex and his best friend. Being paranoid about this i gave him an ultamaduim and he broke it off. After this I did not believe in love I thought he was the one then I met chris. I dont know why I loved him since he was mentally abusive but I did. He also broke up with me while this was happening I had met another guy but he was just a friend to help me. And here is where my break up story begins. At first we just hooked up weird for me because I have never been that type but I felt so safe and comfortable with him. Although I didnt trust him because of my other relationships so he broke up with me briefly then we got back together. We then moved in together and were together for a year and a half. I kept threatening to kick him out because he was misplacing money and other events. He got sick of it and broke up with me. I understood that what I did was painful to him but I just thought he would try to workout it out since we had spent so much time together and lived together. I just don't know where to go from here. After Erik i didn't believe in love then i met my last bf and starting believing again now im back to where i started.

Louise

March 09, 2016 @ (School)

Tags: Bad breakup

I first met my boyfriend on a open evening at school in mid September it was then I discovered I had feelings for him. His birthday was coming up so I decided this was the perfect chance to show that I cared about him so I bought him a birthday present. He was over the moon when I gave him it , it made me happy too. in the start of November 2015 we started going out we had a solid relationship I though nothing could come between us. I was wrong there though. a few weeks into January 2016 some of my so called "friends" started asking him random things "Louise is asking if you still care about her." Louise wants to know why you are telling people that you's are not together anymore".
When my boyfriend told me all the things my "friends" were saying I was heartbroken how could they tell him these things I Loved him and still do very much. the day of our break up was very weird. I went to the shops as normal in the morning before school, then I met him outside the school gates he gave me the best kiss of my life and told me he would love me forever. I really believed he would. but something happened during the school day I'm not in any of his lessons so the only time I would see him was after school. so when the bell went for the end of the day I went and waited for him as usual , but something was wrong he was crying and he never cried. he told me things arnt the same with my friends spreading things about us like this and he couldn't take it any more then he told me he was breaking up with me that was the day he let me walk away crying and he didn't even one word to sort things out. Now 2 months on we never talk and every time I pass him he always stares and smiles, I get along great with his sister who tells me I am all he goes on about but doesn't feel he can ask me out again because he thinks I hate him. I don't I still Love him and always will.
If only he knew how I felt about him maybe we would be together again.xxxxxxxx

Serena

November 20, 2015 @ (Canada)

Tags: Bad break up, spaz, ex, boyfriend, cheating, girls, teen, feelings, tattoo

I dated this guy for about 3 months... I know not that long; but he was my first boyfriend. He treated me good at first and feel in love instantly. He proceed to talk to me about marriage, meeting his parents, and a whole life together. I have trust issues and I get attached way to easily. So one day I was scared because my ex wasn't texting me or calling me all day (he never does that) I cried myself to sleep thinking he was dead in a ditch and not even his parents knew where he was. The next day he texts me saying SHUTUP and calm down. He swear and told me to leave him alone. I broke up with him cause I did not deserve his spaz. After he texts me later telling me he was out with girls having fun and laughing and how the girls made him feel much better then I did ( he even got a tattoo of that night). He didn't care about my feelings and proceed to say hurtful things. So that's my break up and even though I'm the one who ended it, I am the only one hurting.

Saleena

November 18, 2015 @ (Australia )

Tags: broken heart

OK well a few weeks ago a guy broke my heart into millions of pieces and i couldn't do anything about ..... could i ??? honestly i still have hope that we will get back together but in my mind he has made it pretty clear he doesn't like me anymore cause he has a crush on someone else and has successfully started dating her ...But people have different ways of moving on and im just doing it slowly he has his reasons for breaking up with me that i didn't see and still dont know why . This would have been the 2nd time we went out the first time was as good but the 2nd time was better we improved on the things we needed to be improved on and i am still strongly in love with him and its going to take me a while to get over but honestly YES i am ONLY 13 but age is just a number all my friends have told me i will get over it just like he has but i honestly cant he is the only person i want my heart to be broken by. the reason im writing this isn't to show people, i just want to get this out of my head and see if it it sounds as stupid as people think. i don't know why but he has broken my heart twice and every time i haven't been able to hate him or dis like him or love him less than i do i know his feelings are gone and he doesn't like/love me anymore but no matter how hard i try and trust me i have tried these feelings wont disappear but why aren't i surprised this one absolutely amazing guy has taken my heart and cased a spell on me i don't no how to deal with these things im only 13 and i have fallen deeply in love. All my friends think he is an awful person for breaking up with me the way he did which was through my friend on a phone call and obviously i was in tears but it was kind he said he didn't want to do it in person cause he didn't want to see me cry.... which i did in fact cry quite ALOT. i have honestly never cried over a guy besides him both times i have cried when he broken up with me and every single time i always fall for him again why... THIS PAIN that i get every time im around him kills me i struggle some days seeing him smiling and laughing with other girls it makes me notice that he has moved on and he actually deserves a better girl than me i made his life stressful that's all i could give to him not love and comfort but stress. i still love him like seriously who couldn't fall in love with a guy like him he is all i think about every single second minute and hour of the day. know im looking back and the time we shared together, the best days of my high school year was the days i spent with him. If i did show any one this i know they will say im just 13 i will find someone again and all of that, that i have heard PLENTY of times. One of the reasons why i have fallen in love with him is cause when he is with me he is a completely different person he is loving comforting and over all just AMAZING and i feel like a different person, every time we were on the phone would be the most memorable moments, we would talk about the future and what it would be like and all of those amazing things but know that has all gone to waste In one letter he wrote me on our 1 month in the end it said i may hold your hand for a while but you will hold my heart forever and i don't know if that was true but at the time i did believe it and he does and will hold my heart forever. Everything i said to him was true, he may not believe it but its true. I AM TRULY SORRY FOR SCREWING THINGS UP WITH HIM and i hate myself everyday for it that it was my fault he is out of my life likely to be FOREVER and i cant control that. i have made a lot of mistakes in my life but loosing him would be the one that i regret and wish i could change the way things turned out for us but I cant control his feelings and at the moment i cant control my own feelings either at the moment all i do know is that i have fallen deeply in love with this absolutely amazing guy ......
^^^
THAT IS MY STORY

D

August 24, 2015 @ (India)

Tags: So sorry!

We were close friends... but eventually friendship turned to love..he loved me soo much..so did I ..after school we got together.. we met once every month, spoke every day...he sent me his pics.. everything was perfect...until now..just a few weeks back in july 2015... i sent him a collage with our pics and a message..after that i was having my important university examination ( Medicine) so i could not call or text him much..but still i felt that he was avoiding me.. in the midst i tried texting and calling him a zillion times... he never answered my calls..neither did he respond to my text messages... but i was not ready to believe that he would cheat on me... i contacted our school friends..i mean we all were pretty close.. i told them that he was doing this..they told me that they have also stopped getting information from him.. i was alarmed.. they said don't worry and don't spoil your exams..thankfully in the midst of so much anxiety i was able to do my most important exams in life..... and he had told one of my friends who called him upon hearing my complains..the truth behind his avoidance.. but she refused to tell me.. because she was scared of me spoiling my exams..i understood that something was terribly wrong..i waited..yesterday at last my exams got over... she called me at 11:00pm... it was a conference call..three friends... she began.. i listened... his parents saw the collage... his mom cried...and stopped talking to him for two days..his dad still doesn't speak to him... he was beaten... they feel that this is not a serious relationship..and that their son is giving me false hopes..iam a doctor..he is studying for Bcom... his mom said all these.. her parents will never agree..you are playing with her feelings..you will never get settled before her..allow her to live... :'( and made him promise upon Holy Quran .. that he won't speak to me or see me again.. he has decided to lead a bachelor life... :( i cried bitterly... i was helpless..so was he... if he had cheated on me..i could at least hate him.. but we still love each other soo much and yet....i spent sleepless nights..i can't cope....we could not hear each others voices for one last time.. :( ... I don't wanna be any one else's but his... and yes,,, i will wait... i will wait for him... i won't let him go... let me ask my parents when it's time.... the rest I leave to God..... My God had never disappointed me... and I believe in him.. he won't disappoint me any further... Cuz it's our first love.. and I want it to be our first and only love..... <3