Searching for "men"

356 Results For 'men'

Danielle

March 31, 2011 @ (Chicago)

Tags: breakup, first, relationship, heartbroken

My boyfriend and I were together for just over two years. It was the first serious relationship either of us had been in, and we were in love. He fought hard to win me over, and he made me feel more special than I have ever felt in my life. He was my world. I trusted him completely and never in my wildest dreams imagined that he could break my heart.

During the last few months of our relationship, I felt a subtle shift. It was nothing to raise any alarms, but I definitely noticed it. I realized that I was usually the one to initiate affection, or to plan an outing, or even to call. He was still kind and loving, but it felt as though his passion had faded.

I confronted him about it. I asked him if he was still in love with me. The moment I said it, I regretted it. He suddenly looked very confused, and the second he began talking I knew I had opened Pandora's Box. With a pained look in his eyes, he told me he wasn't sure anymore -- that our relationship had become "comfortable." He said he needed time to think.

After a week without contact, he he came over to my apartment. I felt optimistic; I was convinced that we would just end up having a serious talk addressing the inevitable loss of the puppy love stage in our relationship. I was wrong. He told me that he was no longer in love with me, that he no longer wanted to be my boyfriend, but he couldn't imagine losing me as a friend. In that moment I felt my world collapse. I pleaded with him to reconsider, I begged him to stay. Nothing I said had any effect, and he left my place in tears.

It's been six months since I've seen him, and my heart is still in pieces. Our parting was so sudden, I still feel like I'm in shock. After a few months of trying to remain his friend, I quit. The pain of being platonic was too great for me, and my pain was too great for him. Now I'm too scared to reach out to him again for fear of the pain that comes with knowing you've been replaced. All I want is to be back in his arms, but he's let me go and hasn't looked back.

Crushed

March 23, 2011 @ (Georgia)

Tags: ruthless

I was with my guy for over 6 years and i was 7 months pregnant, well a month before i found out i was pregnant he changed, he was always angry and he acted like he despised my touch. well i sorta knew what it was but i was going through the hormones of pregnancy and i just ignored it. well i was bored so i drove to his job to surprise him when he got off so we could maybe go get something to eat, well for all tn he women out there who have experienced this you know what im about to describe, a woman came out and was standing next to a truck she worked there and i got that gut feeling that there was something wrong so i couldnt stop staring at her. then he comes out and the first thing he says is, why are you here, and then walks away to go talk to that b****. i stood there in disbelief so i began to cry and i stormed off, well he turns out was in the beginning stages of a relationship with her and they only went as far as kissing. but fast forward to when i was 7 months pregnant. he was still acting crazy even though we had moved way across the country so i guess he was upset i caught him i dont know but he was still being a jerk. so i ask him when will get married since we already started a family and we been together for so long, well that bastard tells me that he doesnt want to marry me anymore cause he doesnt think im the "one" anymore so he doesnt want to risk marrying me if its just a big mistake. his words exactly. well being pregnant, that far along as well, you can imagine the devastation i felt. well since he was gonna just abandon me and our unborn child i dug through his emails the next day and he told that trick that he was gonna leave and go back home. well being pregnant and knowing that the father is gonna just abandon you and your child will crush anybody's heart.

El

March 16, 2011 @ (NY)

Tags: Youthinkyouhaditbad?

Just a bit of history: My boyfriend and I met our first semester in law school, and dated for 16 months. The first major problem happened about 7 months into our relationship, when I found out I was pregnant and had to have an abortion. My appointment was on a Friday, the day my boyfriend planned to drive to Indianapolis for a Pokemon tournament with his buddies. Yes, a Pokemon tournament. He DID drive me to the appointment, after initially saying he wouldn't because of the tournament, but after it was over, tucked me in at my apartment and shot down to Indy for the remainder of the weekend. Then, in October, I found 2 Craigslist postings by him, one looking for a dude to have sex with, and the other looking for a male to female transexual to have sex with. I wish I were joking. Like a moron in love, I stayed with him. On the night February 12th, 2011, he told me that we were going to be together forever, and have healthy children--something he's said before. The next morning, the day before Valentine's Day, I called him to solidify some plans we had, and he dumped me. For the past month, he has strung me along, and I've been too blindly in love to let him go. Even after breaking up, we agreed to go to our law school's ball together. We had a fight, and I invited someone else, but he told me that he still wanted to go with me and was upset I had purchased another ticket. So we decided that we'd still go together, and he reiterated how happy he was that we were.
Finally, I find out he has been talking to another girl (not from him, of course),and a few days ago, he told me he can't take me to ball, even as a friend, because he can't commit to something 3 weeks away when he doesn't know what his "status" will be.

This guy, who is Mr. Popular in law school, has everyone fooled BUT me. Good riddance.

Aliana

March 16, 2011 @ (India)

Tags: Hm

I got together with my best friend. We had a good time, moved to a city of a different country together to live there for a year during my student exchange. We had a good time and we cared for each other a lot. Soon doubts crept in, I wondered whether I loved him enough, whether this was what I wanted from love in life. Only in the crisis that lead to our break up I learned that he's had similar doubts. The drama is that there was no drama. We broke up in perfect mutual understanding, in agreement over the issues that we didn't like and also sharing the opinion that starting new with somebody else would be the best option. I still believe this is right and I don't want to let things get messy by contacting him, I don't want him to come back out of sympathy and I don't want me to try and get him back just out of the fear of losing an extraordinary friend and perhaps the most supportive, accepting and understanding person I met in my life.
Now, it's only been two weeks and after an amazing conversation with one of my professors who tried to help me (and succeeded doing so in a way), I still doubt my choice and I still miss him and the loss of him is certainly the hardest thing I ever had to take.
Perhaps you guys think this is easier as it didn't get nasty, and perhaps you are right, but is there anything that is more bitter than two people who desperately want to be together and tried to make each other happy but whose love simply wasn't enough?
However, this story just seemed different from most I read here so I'll share it with you.

Sarah

March 12, 2011 @ (michigan)

Tags: 1

my heart has been RIPPED from my chest and im going to cut my story short....My boyfriend broke up with me while i was pregnant for another girl..And that girl has a baby..I get an abortion and he doesnt help pay for any of it...Then he comes crawling back saying hes sorry and he loves me more than anything and that he thought about me every day...and so then i take him back...3 months later he left me for another girl AGAIN...Yeah i know its my fault for taking him back the first time but i honestly thought he was going to change...SO let that example be a lesson to you ladies. Men NEVER change when they say they're going to and that you have to watch out for piece of shit guys out there like that!!!!

Jessica

March 12, 2011 @ (Minnesota)

Tags: love, detachment

We were old school friends and had been, in those days, pretty close. Not long after I got out of my last relationship, he called me up out of the blue (we had kind of drifted apart) and asked me out. I had had the biggest crush on him when we went to school, so I agreed.

We had an amazing couple of months together. I had never been so in love with anyone I had ever dated. Then we had our first fight. It was a blur of misunderstandings, harsh words, and lots of emotion. We didn't talk for a few days.

It took all I had not to get emotional when I saw him again, but I knew if I did, he'd get defensive and things would just get worse. After we talked everything over (and we both apologized) I felt great. He told me he loved me and that I was the first girlfriend he'd had in quite a while that he felt semi-serious about. I felt closer to him than I ever had.

But then, he proceeded to spew some crap about how he'd been detaching himself from me and how he didn't think the relationship could work out because of it. Apparently, this so-called "love" he felt for me could be disregarded over our FIRST fight. He may as well of just ripped my heart out of my chest and stomped on it.

I broke up with him. How was I supposed to be with someone who could detach himself from me over one fight that I apologized for over and over again?

But then I felt bad. I loved him so much- what kind of person would I be if I didn't try again? I texted him, begging him to talk to me. Begging him to tell me why he didn't love me enough to get over this fight. Begging him to tell me why this wouldn't work out if it had been going so well up to that point. I don't beg- ever. His response? "I don't feel like talking right now- sorry." No matter how much I begged him to talk because I needed him to, he wouldn't.

So I said goodbye. Guys- if you don't really care, don't tell a girl she means the world to you and that you love her. Apparently, for my guy, I shattered his perfect image of me by actually having feelings and by being hurt by our fight. Terrible, I know.

Catalina

March 12, 2011 @ (california)

Tags: 2

my ex and i had a perfect communication and he was an awesome boyfriend.. but unfortunetly he never had time to hang out outside of school much and well...now my question is.."how do you tell yur ex yur pregnant if both of you guys are still virgins??"..i honestly dont think he wud believe me and think i cheated on him..and why wud i do that if i care about him and love him??it sounds imposible because this doesnt happen to many people..and i kno the baby is his because hes the only guy ive everdone anything with besides kiss..i dont know what to do..my ex and i are good friends at the moment..i know he still likes me because he told some of my friends..he just didnt have time fur anything..he was a busy dude:/..my friends asked him,"what would you do or think if yur girlfriend told you that she got prego by you??" and he said that he doesnt believe in a girl becoming pregnant without sex..i feel like if he were to tell me to get a DNA test..i would get it, mail it to him and pack my things and raise my baby on my own..somewhere far like mexico maybe..because he denied it the day he made me get a DNA test..and beacuse he thought that low of me

Eva

March 10, 2011 @ (Kenya)

Tags: Fresh experience 1

He didn't even tell me why it was over.We hang out in the evening at his work place(he worked at his cousin's barber shop)and I gave him a love card I had bought and written for him.He then disappeared for days and his friends couldn't tell me where he'd gone. I called him 3 days later and he spoke to me casually, told me he'd travelled out of town. He'd return the next week. I didn't call him or go to look for him where he worked; thought he'd at least call me.When I decided to call him another three days later, it was the usual casual tone, then he pretended he couldn't hear me. I was so hurt, I hung up and sent him a break up text,asked him if I 'd done sth. wrong or if he heard sth. about me.Told him I didn't deserve the harsh treatment and how I had always felt he held back his full affection from me(this was true) blah blah blah. Then I asked him to confirm our break up.BUT HE DIDN'T EVEN RESPOND.Thank God I never slept with him, but I gave him my sinceremost care.It hurts that he couldn't even break up with me openly- treated me like trash.I just want to scream in his face or sth! I desire to have his reaction, to have him show me some emotion at least!But I believe we'll have a second seating:a second stage , different terms and the tables will turn.What goes around comes around , you know ,'malipo ni hapa duniani' - 'your rewards/what you deserve will meet you right here in this world/lifetime', says the swahili saying. For now I'm Just relieved to have shared this problem. It's halved.

Little Ol\

February 24, 2011 @ (Winnipeg, Canada)

Tags: (example1, example2)

I had moved to Ottawa to live with my mom when I was 16. Shortly after my 17th birthday I met this guy "D" who I fell head over heels with, my first true love so to speak. Though we never really branded ourselves as an "item", we did spend a lot of time together and would make out often. We told each other EVERYTHING. This would only last for a few months as my mom announced that we were moving back to Winnipeg. I was devestated, but me and him kept in contact while I was back in Manitoba.

Fast forward four years... I went back to Ottawa to see if we still had anything left from before. We were still close friends and told each other everything, but, he was not ready to commit to me or anyone, I was crushed but wanted him in my life in some capacity even if we were just "friends". Then it happened, some one made up a story about something I did and he believed it. We had a huge fight and he vowed he never wanted to see me again. I went back to Winnipeg again with a broken heart.

Over the next decade I ended up getting married and having a son, but my thoughts would always roam to "D". Sometimes fond memories, sometimes anger, but a huge piece of my heart still belonged to him.

My "husband" turned out to be a chronic cheater and we were in the process of ending our marriage. I had gone online and ended up talking to one of my old friends from Ottawa and the topic of "D" came up and I had mentioned that I missed "D". My friend had to go offline as did I but we ended up online again later that night, this time he brought "D" into our conversation.

"D" and I talked that whole night, and every day since then. We STILL had feelings for each other and I flew out a month later for a visit. It was amazing, we laughed, we talked, we kissed, we made love, and we cuddled.

For seven months we did the long distance thing, then I took the big plunge and moved to Ottawa for the third time, this time it's been four years together, we are in the midst of planning our wedding and our future lives together.

I know that this was not a break up story per say, but I wanted to show that you can break up a few times before getting it right. A break up doesn't always have to be forever.

Dumped

February 20, 2011 @ (Texas)

Tags: cold breakup

I'm a member of a singles group, a dating agency, basically, and while this was not the most hurtful breakup, it was a pretty cold one. After a month of really great dates and lots of encouragement (from her) for more of the same, the day before a dinner/dance event she slammed me with the revelation of another guy. I absolutely didn't see this coming. Not that we were exclusive, but every bit of feedback I was getting suggested she was focused only on us.

So she called me and in a very business-like way, proceeded to explain that, “The program is set up so you can date other people…” There were no kind softeners. No, “I really like you, but…”; no, “I’ve had a great time with you, but…”; nothing, nada, zip. Just, here are the rules and I followed them.

Then, twice she said, “I wanted to call you myself and let you know, so you didn’t hear it from someone at the group.” Excuse me? What half-mature adult wouldn't call personally to break off a relationship? Newsflash: there's nothing righteous about doing something that's simply responsible. The entire breakup felt like the severing of a business relationship, which makes sense, because she's a corporate officer.

Finally, I wrote her a follow-up e-mail, in which I thanked her for letting me know about this personally (dummy!), and wished her love and happiness. She never replied. Wouldn’t one at least respond in kind, if only briefly? Example: “Dear (you), I wish you love and happiness, too.”

Oh well. The Zen master teaches to disapprove of the action, but not of the actor. Perhaps, but if she becomes available again, I don't have to date her.