Searching for "cia"

182 Results For 'cia'

Anonymous

November 01, 2014 @ (Hong kong)

Back in 2012, a new guy came to my school. Every girl was obsessed with him and thought that he was handsome and all, including me. That guy was also the one who made me fall in love with him. But not only me, but together with 3-4 other girls at the same time. On September 28th, we were having a party because of a girl's bday. That guy was there as well, and it came out that the guy actually liked the girl who was having her bday there. Me (and all the others) saw them kissing and all.. I started to cry in front of everyone because I just couldn't handle it..
After a few months I finally got over him. Until November 2013, he told me that he already liked me since September 2013, but the matter was : he was still with that girl. They were sexually active and all. I didn't accepted him or something but I still kept talking to him, because deep in my heart I still liked him.
March 2014, we were together since now. In this time I learned that he has a really bad temper and gets mad at the smallest things. I had mood swings for 4-5 months when I was with him.
In July 2014, I went to a foreign country for the whole summer. He freaked out and kept on blaming me for leaving, he kept telling me that we would break up, and scolded at me with a lot of foul language.
I felt so miserable and didn't know what to do.
At the last week of my holiday I decided to break up with him, cause he treated me just like rubbish. When he heard that we were going to break up, he freaked out even worse than before, he threatened me that he would kill himself, and stuff like that.
When I was back, he was at the airport with a huge board, all about our stories and the happy things we've been through and all the little things that I thought he was supposed to forget.
We went back together again, but yesterday I discovered that he haD token nude pics of himself and his ex, when they were still in a relationship. That broke me, because he never had told me anything about his ex. I felt like I was just being lied to, these 8 months. He just said that the past is in the past, and things like this. He doesn't understand my feelings at all. He still keeps his exes diys and pictures on his laptop, thinking that I didn't know. At the beginning, he made me feel so special that I thought that we would never break up and stuff, now I'm just crying and crying and crying.
I told him that I want one week to think about what I should do and that I need to analyse everything. He begged me to not break up with him again because he told me that I'm his "everything" and all.
I'm just broken by the fact that he didn't told me these things. Every time I hear these things, it's never from him, it's always one of my friends who tell me this. I feel so fucked up right now and feel like I've been lied on for these 8 months.

Gu

October 22, 2014 @ (China)

Tags: Bad breakup, love is about letting go

I consider her the most important girl in my life. Let me tell you why.

Before I dated her, I had three previous relationships.

The first I consider a puppy love; the second I stole her virginity and cheated on her; the third I thought I love her much, but objectively speaking it was too sexual. In between I was also very flirtatious. I love to fool around and usually grow an immediate attraction to those girls who are willing to talk about sex, aka sluts. I was very into sex.

After I got hurt from my last breakup, I told myself I would never believe in love again. So I decided I could just turn back into the old me and flirt around. Eventually, I also slept with someone who wasn't my girlfriend. I also allowed myself to engage in cyber sex with a girl who had a bf back then.

None of this was known about me by the public. I hide it pretty well. I live with a double face life.

All of this ended after I fell in love with this special girl. It was a love at first sight. We had been close friends, maybe even best friends more like 7 to 9 months back then. I just suddenly realize how much care she actually giving me, and how I am actually really attracted to this kind of good girl. So I started showing her my love and fortunately she also loves me. Falling in love with your best friend is just beautiful. (this is coming from a guy)

She is just a pure girl. Someone with good moral values, who can really lead you to the right path. She is also very traditional. So we agree we would have no sex until we are fortunate enough to get married. And since then, for 20 months, we simply make out and have no sex. If you ask the old me, I guess I would have been shocked to know I can live without having sex with my gf. (I rmb I was literally angry when my second gf didn't agree to have sex with me back then; and then I also was very sexually involved with the next gf; and of course that time that I allowed myself to engage in casual sex)

But of course, its more than that. I just realize this kind of life, where I follow good value, be a good guy, no double life is what I truly want. In a sense I realize I had destroyed my integrity with what I did before. All this was only made possible because of her being with me, her loving me.

At the beginning, it turned out she actually knew some of my past. And she said if I am not the same anymore, she is willing to give me a chance. I felt really touched by that. I think that is what being loved feels like: knowing you are a sinner but somehow a great girl still willing to give you another chance to be a better man. I told myself I won't let this girl down ever again.

I hope it's obvious now how special she is to me. In a sense, she was there with me at the right time. Being here with me when I sinned, when learnt from my past and mature enough to know what is right for myself and what is not.

Unfortunately, we didn't last.

The problem was that she somehow dug my old stuff out. My old chat history with my previous girlfriends or sluts that I flirted with. And because of some reason, I also had to tell her about my causal relationship (terribly so, the girl is someone she knows)

It just all started to crumble for her.

As she read those words, she got more and more disappointed at me. She is very upset and hurt for what I did. This might have sth to do with her possible bipolar disorder and family issues that has made her highly insecure. And I am her first bf too. There is a lot going on her mind: insecurity, sharing her guy with many girls, not able to trust my words anymore and so on. So she kept asking for breakups. I tried to save our relationship millions of times already. But her hatred against me and her pain just grew. So finally I agree to try and separate from her...

It's so difficult for me. It's just the first day of not talking to her today. And obviously I am dying. But once I recall what I did, and think about her hurt she is because of me, I know I am making the right decision this time to give her the same she deems.

It's time for me to brave and take care of her. (She has always been the "strong" person in our relationship more often than me) She deserves to be happy. Maybe we can get back together if she can be mature enough to let go of my past. Or maybe can't. Either way I hope she can really be happy. Because I am indeed very happy with her.

She changed me for the better. I am forever indebted to her. I also wouldn't go back to those dark alleys like I once did.

I am changed, forever, because of her. And I am hoping to show her how special and how much I love her, by letting her go...

Ksofia

September 23, 2014 @ (Tampa )

Tags: Bad break upj

Well I met this boy in high school a year and a half ago, he wasn't even the tipe of guys I would go for, we were complete opposites, but we became good friends for about two months and started dating. We hit it of so well it was one of my most amazing loves. Through out our relationship there was this girl that would always want contact him and I never trusted her, me and him would have disputes everytime she messaged him it never stopped. When I told him to block her on facebook she had a tumbler with a nudes picture of her self and she massaged him through there as well, when I found that I told him to delete it. I thought finally she would stop. Anyways one day he comes home and just breaks up with me no reason or explanations I was shocked so heartbroken. And I couldnt help but think it was because of her.. The next day I texted him and Told him I would pick him up from work to talk, we did and he treated me like he'd never shared a life with me. A complete jerk! All he kept saying was "I need time" and he claimed to still love me. He even said that after time passes he would make up his mind about us, giving me false hope. All for what? I couldn't take it anymore, decided to hack all his social medias and it turns out had been talking to this girl months before. This girl is honestly the lowest of the lowest, and he completely disgust me. I thought so high of him, believing his every promise and it turn out he's was just a liar. And would drop me all for some girl that told him showed him and promises to do all sorts of nasty things to him. i wish he would have broken up with me before starting all these things with this girl. Thats what hurt the most. All this happened behind my back. I'm glad I get to move on and not have to worry about him because honestly he's not even the list not worth it anymore.

Thadra S

August 13, 2014 @ (Minneapolis)

Tags: dating a musician, funny break up,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sz9A6jURpg

Natasha

August 08, 2014 @ (New Jersey)

Tags: bad breakup, betrayal

Ok, so here it goes. We met in college at 19 years old, he pursued me. We went out on a date and boom from there we saw each other multiple times, got into a relationship and fell in love. He was my first love and he broke my heart. We were together about 4 and 1/2 years, he lived with me in my mom's house and we didn't charge him any rent or anything always made sure he had food, clothes whatever he needed, I took care of him pretty much. He was a great guy, always treated me well but very unmotivated which caused me to be very bitchy towards him because I just wanted him to make something of himself and do something with his life. When you are with someone almost 5 years you want your relationship to move forward and progress and I just felt like we were stuck. Besides the point I made many mistakes in the relationship too but what happened in the end is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. We started to drift and I noticed so he went away for the weekend as did I separately to think things over and I wanted to work on it because I was still in love with him and he didn't have any desire to work on it so just like that it was over. Now here comes the good part. I confided in one of my close friends about the breakup and told her I was still in love with my ex only to find out her and him started dating 2 weeks later after him and I broke up and apparently they are in love now and in a relationship. Mind you I know this girl since I was 12 years old. My heart is shattered into pieces, it is honestly a horrible feeling when someone betrays you like this especially when you spend so much time with a person and they say they will never hurt you but they do. The biggest lesson I have learned from this is to never put to much trust in anyone. Honestly this situation has made me doubt ever wanting to fall in love again because the heartbreak just hurts to much.

Dina

July 25, 2014 @ (Lebanon)

Tags: going through a breakup

No this ain't another happy ending story .
Beautiful,smart,funny,talented,good hearted ?
when it comes to love you forget all your qualities .
You Just love the person who makes you question your own self.Like any other person, I fell in love, well don't I have the right to?
He was a family-friend, and like any charming man he was irresistible .
every thing we did based on good intentions that's for sure . Should we blame our hearts for beating faster ? or our bodies for getting nervous? or our minds for day dreaming ?
We didn't plan falling in love indeed.
But we couldn't stop our hands of reaching each other . nor our hearts of finding each other.
Well it was amazingly speechless, it was our little paradise.
We happily lived together for a long time.
we kissed, we went to parties, we got drunk , we watched each one another fall asleep.. we faced many problems but we worked it out . The perfect life of two wild teenagers.
He ditched everything for me his studies , his work and whatever , i know it sounded bad so i convinced him to return to his old life. I won the dispute but i never thought i'd lose my man.
i was never the 'drama queen' but at the moment of goodbye it was like our lives stopped for awhile , people stopped moving , everything became frozen we couldn't feel anything but ourselves.
Yea days passed and we didn't stop talking to each other including Skype and other communication apps.
We got busy so we stopped the ''talking'' gradually , well yea maybe we failed at long distances relation like many others.
Well i was too faithful thinking he'd come back again.
Then i figured it all out. He broke our dreams, our hopes, our promises , our thoughts , our hearts , MY HEART.
He cheated on me , well gratefully he wasn't the one who keeps his dirty work as a 'secret' , he was an honest one.
Yea the sun rises again letting the dark disappear ,i decided to move on and let the past get buried.
I started seeing other people , letting hope get in, and my past out.
But you know what it was never the same, not the same feelings, not the same thoughts , not the same him. Though they were much better men, but hey love isn't related to materials nor facial image.
He was still in touch with my family specially my mom , he was there when my Grandpa died and transported the news for my mom . Every time we communicate again it feels like magic , the same feelings reappeared again like it never faded.
But its never going to work again . I'd trust him again but i won't trust myself with him.
It's not about cheating, people make mistakes. But he never came back when i left him how would i trust him again, how would i let him in when everything around me says that i should get out.

Steven G

July 11, 2014 @ (Yonkers, NY)

Tags: love, loss, bad break up, cheating, relationship

I have yet to go wrong on a â€œgut feelingâ€ when it comes to a disaster with a significant other. I somehow can sense the bomb going off but never in time to defuse it. The most recent example was by a lovely lady I was seeing for several months. She and I did not land on solid ground due to the conditions of our start. We shared many laughs, cries, and plenty about each other during that time. I was hesitant at first about her feelings at first, not knowing if they were true or just brought up by the circumstances of her previous relationship. We shared a wild, strong sexual appetite during the first half of our relationship. Facing personal dilemmas and financial difficulties; she pursued a second job in which she could balance herself with. She quickly got an offer to work a gentlemenâ€™s club as a coat checker. I saw the potential for disaster, keeping in mind her personality, state of mind, and lack of experience with the world. I feared that I might lose her in the process to some money throwing pig. Yet I needed to keep my personal fears in check and support who I regarded as my babe with anything she set her mind to. If this one thing could break us, than all my suspicions would be true; if they donâ€™t than we could move forward, take the leap into going public with our relationship.

Several weeks later we began to drift apart, we would ignore mutual calls and text. We did not see each other for days at a time. I began to worry about us, and so I began to call her more often, asking how she was and brought up ideas on trips we could take. It had little to no affect, as her eyes and perhaps even her heart were set on someone else whom she met at the gentlemenâ€™s club. One evening we got into an argument; and just like that, she asked me never to speak to her again; without any hesitation on my part, I hung up. The next day I told her we needed to talk; it was important that we clear the air. No response ever came that day, or the next day, or the day after. I tried once more and she quickly delivers the blow â€œI need timeâ€ which we all know to be â€œbreak-up modeâ€. I tried and tried again to see her so we could talk, all while sensing the inevitable blow that was soon to come. I would go to her apartment late at night, and she and her truck wouldnâ€™t be there. I knew that I had lost her at this point; or maybe just 99%. I took a chance and went to her one last time; even after she told me not to. I gave her everything that she ever wanted, with a promise to be there always. She wasnâ€™t giving in, she could not see being with me being better than the guy that she met recently. I knew that my words were barely chipping away at her wall. She was cold all throughout this and yet at the end she hugged me and showed me signs of remorse or sympathy. Before she walked back in I asked her, if in this last moment, we could turn things around and try to work this out with a clean slate. Her lips said no, but in her eyes, I saw a glimmer of yes. Despite what I felt, she gave me the closure I had asked her for. I wished her the best, and reminded her that I would always have her in my heart. Got in my car, and I had the most difficult drive of my life.

Ricky

July 08, 2014 @ (Granger, Indiana)

Tags: Blindsided Breakup

I had met her about two years ago at school. She was new in town since she just moved from Colorado. After about a year later I started getting invited to her parties and to her house to watch a movie or something. For the sake of privacy her name will be Rosie. We had only begun to be serious about Fall of 2013. I had committed to seeing her father monthly to talk with him about her. There was one problem. Rosie's family was a strong Christian family while I always had trouble with faith so I retained an Atheist standpoint. However, I was accepted by her family as long as I tried to adapt a Christian lifestyle. I blindly accepted the task and was given permission to date her. Now, I had issues at the time. I hadn't been able to see a purpose in life and constantly thought about suicide. Once I told her she helped me through it and those thoughts left me alone. We would sit on the school balconies holding hands as she talked me through it. We officially started dating on January 20th, 2014. Everything seemed fine with us. And I like to think that it was. Those times were the best in my life. I was convinced that even though it doesn't happen, she would be my first and my last. Oh how I was wrong. We had our first argument about a week ago so around July 1st or 2nd. I was in Europe at the time so I couldn't talk with her face to face. The issue was that I was a constant pessimist. That she couldn't be happy when she was with me. I didn't understand since I always had a negative view on events. I told her that once I get back that we would meet and make amends. So we did. Yesterday. July 7th, 2014. She came over to my house and we had a great time. At the end of the day we talked about what was wrong. I asked if I could have time to work on it and I was granted it. Then her phone buzzed letting know her parents were on their way. She sighed and looked at me. Right then she dropped the bomb. "I think we should break up". I couldn't move anymore. The day had been great, I had been as positive as I could be. I was calm. I asked why. "I can't be happy with you and I can't be with someone who has different views as I do". I was shocked. Then the pleading began. Everything I said was shut down. Then her third and final reason arose, "I feel like I'm replaceable in your life". After all we had gone through it was unbelievable. Then I knew that this was her parents doing. Before I could say anything more she was out the door. I ran to the other room where I had a gift from Europe for her, I wanted her to take it. So I wouldn't have to hold on to it, but once I made it out of the door she wasn't there. Dumbfounded, I sat on the front porch and cried. Like I never had before. She left me with the lingering questions of why I didn't get a second chance and what went wrong today. Since I haven't been able to sleep tonight, I read up on the worst kinds of break ups. I found my own at number one, the blindsided break up. She had been convinced since we argued that I wasn't the one and I was led to believe everything was alright before I was shot with some of the worst words you'll ever hear. That same day...she held my hand, hugged me, and said that she loved me.

Aubery

May 30, 2014 @ (India)

Tags: just tired and disappointed in myself

he was a friend from a long to one of the very few people i talk to with all my heart. And he is quiet perfect actually very well natured, good at heart, understanding and doesnt have any sort of bad habits. so naturally i said yes when he wanted to be more than friend because i did not find a reason to say no....
but i did not feel the spark that intense feelings towards him.... i thought that slowly i would fall in love but i never did... i care a lot about him but i dnt think its to the level to be called as love... and more over i dont have passion or lust i generally get bored when he tries to make out... but he genuinely loves me (much mare then i deserve actually)... i kept waiting (careful not to break his heart) that suddenly i would realize that i love him... but it became suffocating especially when he practically glows with love in my presence... i desperately try to return that emotion but i just cannot... so now i just gave up trying to feel that non-existent love and decided to move on... i know i broke his heart and i feel so terrible... was my decision if not right at-least reasonable ?

Carmen

May 29, 2014 @ (United States)

Tags: break-up, annoying, bad person

We were juniors in college when we finally started dating. We'd been friends for a few months and had attended some social functions on campus together. Unfortunately for him, Tom had a terrible reputation on campus, not for being a player or anything, but for being a terrible person in general. My friends constantly reinforced this information before I agreed to date him exclusively. I questioned him about the various rumors regarding him and his only answers involved: "I don't remember," or "That's all in the past." I was extremely skeptical that anyone could change that fast (we'd only been in school for a couple of years!) but I wanted to see who he was for myself so I agreed to go out with him. The next six months were filled with depression and anger for me for a lot for a lot of reasons. For one thing, he would talk about problems we were having with a mutual female friend rather than talking to me about them. I didn't know I was in a threesome! He was a terrible communicator in general. When talking to his friends or an audience, he would be charming, but when talking to my friends or meeting my family, he was incredibly awkward. It wouldn't have bothered me as much if he were shy, but he was able to hold perfect conversations with complete strangers. On top of all this, I witnessed him lying to other people's faces, including his friends and family. Because of this, I knew for sure that he could not be trusted. Around the three-month mark, we exchanged "I love you's" and around that time, the little affection he was showing me was slowly wearing down. He never complimented me much anyway (except when we were making out), but those just stopped. Our time together was mainly spent making out once a week in his dorm even though I insisted that we should spend time talking and bonding in other ways. I guess he thought that because I was in love with him I was going to tolerate that. And I did for another two months before telling him that I'd been feeling neglected and that he wasn't keeping up his end of the compromise (He told me he'd be more open emotionally if I agreed to make out with him more). He told me it was hard and that that was the way he'd always been. No effort. No anything. He was the first person I'd done ANYTHING physical with and that was hard for me, but I was willing to try and compromise. He didn't try at all. During month six, I dumped him while we were on a walk. He was shocked. I did cry the weekend afterward, but I quickly realized how much happier I was without him in my life. I couldn't believe how being involved with him could make me feel so lonely and depressed. I've been single for a month now and while it sucks sometimes, I know I'm mentally in a better place now. I learned that it's better to be alone than with the wrong person.