Tags: Difficult break up..
I decided to write about how is my recently break up going. I know many of you are having the same situation as me, therefore I will explain how is my situation so you can understand me.
A year ago, 2015, I started dating a guy from a different culture, religion, way of thinking and more. We connected really well, at first it was like wonderland everyday, we talked for hours, went out, laughed, and more.. It felt like a real relationship full of confidence, truth, and more of it we respected each other. We did so many things together, I even started to learn his language, I changed so many things for him, The first 7 moths together were so perfect, I never though that he will change from one day to another.. He stated changing day by day, sometimes i felt like he was so bored to be with me, but other times i felt like he was so happy, I was so confused, even tho i never told him what i felt, he sometimes noticed i guess but never said a word. There were some days he came to me saying he wants to try a night with another girl, i swear he stabbed me every time he said that, but i couldnâ€™t do anything, all i did was laugh like it wasnâ€™t a big deal but it was. I hide so many times how i really felt because i didnâ€™t want him to worry or something. I remember even he told me he could thrown me if I do something wrong, and many times he told me that his friends will always come first than me, I mean I was his girlfriend right?, why would he say stuff like that.. It was just too much but i never payed attention because I did not want to lose him, and I did anyways.
Anyways, a week before he broke up with me, he was acting so weird, I knew there was something but like always I didnâ€™t pay attention. Indeed there was something, on a Tuesday, Jan 12, 2016, at 8pm he came to me and said he wanted to talk to me about something, there.. I knew he wanted to break up, my world just fall apart when he said it, he gave me some crazy reasons and I just played along. I couldnâ€™t believe what I was hearing.. Well after that, 3 days after I went to a party, and I remember i got so drunk, all because I found out he was already talking to another girl. IT BROKE MEâ€¦
A week after, he came again to me but not as he wanted to go back, he just wanted to make sure of some stuff, but neither of us could help it so we kissed, everything came back to HAPPINESS, only it was NOT.! He said I canâ€™t control myself around you but I want to still being like this, only not as a relationship, I first said alright letâ€™s try, but to be honest it wasnâ€™t enough for me, he was like that with me but also playing with another girl, so i tried to stopped it and until now i couldnâ€™t. I am still in the same situation, i feel like a stupid sometimes, thinking that he would change, but no, it is worse. he still is playing with that other girl, and I am still hurting.
I will never regret any of this, the only thing i regret is how blind I am.
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