Searching for "first"


430 Results For 'first'

Brooke

January 30, 2014 @ (Carlsbad, CA)

Tags: Bet, In Love, Young, Naive, High School, Virginity, Fake Friends, Bad People


So, I'm eighteen now but I'm going to rewind a year to my sophomore year..


~2 YEARS AGO~

When I was 16 I moved to California from Atlanta.. When I got here I was well known because of my skin color and my suprising hair length.. I got some secret admirers during the first few months and some not so secret admirers.. For the most part I had a very small group of girl friends but a large group of acquaintances.. Everyone I knew I was introduced to by one of my friends.. I was invited to a party about a month after I arrived by one of my friends (let's call her Becca). So Becca introduced me to three guys at the party (Let's call them Luke, Nate, and Daniel). So Luke and I really hit it off and we started to hang out.. Everywhere Becca took me Luke was there.. After another month of us hanging out we officially started dating.. He was so sweet to me and I remember always thinking.. 'I'm so in love with this guy'.. We spent every moment together and he treated me so well.. When I got a job at this tanning spa he would always bring me food and gifts.. After another month of this he started to disappear.. I wasn't really worried about it at the time because I was a dumb love-struck child.. After a few weeks of absence with only phone calls he reappeared and his charm was in over-drive.. Around this time rumors started floating around school that I was a slut and all that shit and that Luke got me pregnant.. I asked him about it and he just insisted that they were jealous and told me he loved me.. He told me this every day five times a day almost for the next three weeks.. And then he proposed... (Yes, he proposed to me at 16.. And my dumb ass said 'yes') Welp.. I lost my virginity that night.. (Don't judge me.. He's a con-artist) And the gifts, the visits, the 'I love you's, the calls, everything.. Stopped. I was still infatuated with him and I refused to believe he used me.. He never proposed with a ring which should've told me that he wasn't serious but I thought him saying 'I love you' was good enough.. The rumors at school got worse in his absence and I heard an interesting theory swirling around.. It was a bet. I refused to believe it at first until I decided to ask Becca about it.. She just cried and cried and cried.. She kept telling me she was sorry and she didn't know he would actually do it.. Turns out my 'friends' Nate and Daniel bet Luke $200 dollars that he couldn't take my virginity before the year was up.. TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS IS WHAT MY VIRTUE MEANT TO THEM!! Luke came back to school a month later and acted as if I was invisible.. I stopped talking to all my friends and found a new group.. I confronted Luke a week later and he said he just fell out of love and the bet never existed which I know is bullshit because he somehow got a new paintjob for his car.. I didn't cry.. I wasn't sad.. I was pissed beyond words.. He dismissed me so easily after he took something that was meant for my husband.. I could've hurt him as easily.. I thought about slashing his tires or something like that but in the long run I didn't do anything that could get me in trouble.. I let it go. It's been two years since then and I have a new boyfriend.. His name is Chris! I love him sooo much and unlike Luke we're taking it slow because we both know what it's like to get hurt.. I've spoken to Luke once since the confrontation and that was to curse him out and vent a little bit.. Which ultimately ended in him walking away and me slapping him.. I hope Luke finds someone good so that when he does some shit like that to her and she leaves he'll know how other people feel when he mistreats them.. Chris and I are in love.. And I'm sure this time because it feels different than the love I had for Luke.. It feels natural.. I guess I felt strained in my relationship with Luke without realizing it because I had nothing to compare it to.. Just in case you were wondering.. Yes. My parents know what Luke did to me and his parents know too.. I'm not going to share what happened because that's between our families but I'll tell you Luke owes my family a lot of money.. This experience has made me stronger in more ways than one and more alert.. Before you judge me you have to remember I was naive and sixteen.. With college time nearing and my upcoming move to L.A. with Chris I can let go of all the scars that my move to California gave me because I got lots of opportunities too! If anything like this happens to you know that there is light at the end of the tunnel.. I found my light! This is for the girls.. Save your V-Card.. You only have one and make sure it counts and he really deserves it.. I made the fatal mistake to give it to someone who saw it is nothing more than a bet and hasn't even apologized.. I hope you learned something from my mistake.. Byeeee!


       

Ryan

January 26, 2014 @ (Washington)

Tags: Bad breakup


I fell for this girl when I was in the Marines. We both our first everything and we were together for over 5 years. I gave everything I had to her and supported her in every way possible whether it be financial or emotional. Without me she never would have finished school or accomplish what she accomplished. Her and her friends treated me horribly sometimes and I felt like I was never on the top of her list. Then one day she said she didn't love me and moved out. Her and her family completely disowned me and wouldn't return any calls or messages. I realize now she had her claws in me deep and was a bad person who used me. She got what she wanted out of me and left.


       

Lyn

January 23, 2014 @ (New york)

Tags: Bad break up, I still love him, First love


Our relationship was totally unexpected. Last september 2013, a guy that I had a teeny tiny bit of a crush asked me out unexpectedly. No clues, No everything. Out of shock, I started freaking out. I don't know what to do. My mind screamed no, but heart says yes! The reson why i don't want to go on is because im scared of my mom. Like really. She's the definition of a really strict mom. i was scared but then a thought crossed my mind.

Why not accept this? Everything happens for a reason right?

That's when I said Yes. For the first 2 weeks it was amazing. The sparks, the giddy butterflies in my tummy were there until my mom found out about him. It was horrifying. My mom was in range. My mom threatened me to talk to him in school. I was scared. I told her that I promise to break up witj. So I did. I explained to him everything. After a day, things were back together. We decided to mend things back together. I mean we aren't officially dating but you know what I mean? You can sense that something's still going on? Yup, that's it. October came, he stole my first kiss. It was magical. All I could ever think about is that I love him. That everything revolves around him. Its like he's my world. He's my strength yet he is also my weakness. Everything in him is just perfect. The way he surprises me with kisses.. The way he brought Gatorade just for me (Gatorade is my favorite drink, i just love that shit lol)
It was perfect. Everything was perfect. There are even times when he makes silly jokes or I took glances at him in class and im like 'shit, I love this guy' I was soo inlove. It was just.. Perfect. I never been so happy in my life. Everytime I woke up he's all I ever think about. He's cute 'Good Morning's'.. It made me cry, thinking about all those happy memories.
When christmas break came, he told me that his wifi router got broken.. Me, being the understanding girl that I am, understands him. I told him it was okay that he shouldn't worry about me.

(We talk and chat in Kik. We can't text since my mom checks my phone all the time)

One time, back at christmas break.. I was looking at my chat box in facebook but Something totally made me stop in my tracks. He was online. And he was usinh he's phone. I messaged him, i did everything but noo, he wouldn't reply anymore.. I don't know why. Christmas eve came, I kept on looking at my phone hoping that maybe he'd greet me a merry christmas but no, nothing came. It broke my heart. But one thing crossed my mind. I was like 'oh maybe he's wifi router is still destroyed'

New year came, I was waiting. Waiting for him to atleast greet me but no, nothing still came. It hurt me. It Crushed me .. to millions of pieces. But there's one thing that made me ball my eyes out.. He's close friend messaged me in facebook. He's like;

Happy new year __ ! How are you and him? I hope that this year is going to be a big blast for both of you. Best wishes. Haha don't forget im one of your #1 Fans of LYN! hahaha cx

That totally made me cry. I mean out of everything why that? Why his friend.? Its really heartbreaking to know that he's friend greeted me, while him? No. There was no effort. It crushed me. The way his friend says he want us to be good this year. It break me.

School came along, i tried not to approch him. Waiting for him to atleast apologize or say Hi, or ask me how my christmas break went but nothing. He never did. It crushed me. The next day, I tried talking to him but he was distant like he really is. He's bestfriend approached me and told me he wanted to talk. I listened. He's bestfriend told me the truth. He met a girl back at christmas break. He went to the movies with her and ate in a restaurant. It killed me. I was paralyzed in my seat. My breathing hitched. My face paled. My mind went blank. I felt like crying but my tears wouldn't fall. My eyes feel numb. My skin is on fire. I feel like someone just throwed me a bucket of lava. Just like that. It crushed me. I've lost weight. Im not the happy girl like before. Every recess or lunch, I don't mingle with my friends anymore. I just stay in the classroom, facing the wall, got my phone out and stay there till' its over. It crushed me. I'm not the bubble person that I am before. But you know what hurt me the most? He acted as if I never exist. It was like I was invinsible. That he couldn't see me. Just like that. There are times that I break down in class. I just couldn't help it. He looks soo happy without me. Huge smile in his face. And well, I also think that he has a crush on this girl.. He craves for her attention. He sits with her all the time in class. He talk about her all the time. I don't know what to do. Its killing me since we are classmates. I could see him everyday. Its hard to ignore him. It really is. It broke my heart. he is the love of my life. He's my everything. He's the only reason why I smile. Its hard. I mean he is after all my first love. My first ever boyfriend. My first kiss. It hurt me to know that another that I love, would leave me again. Like my dad. He left me. I mean sure, I got to see him and everything but it isn't like before. My dad has another daugther who is my half sister. My dad loves her so much. He wouldn't even bother to talk to me anymore. He wouldn't crave for our communication. When me and my dad's girlfriend fight, he always take her side. It kills me. Another guy who I love would leave me again. Wow, What did I do to deserve this? It kills me. Its almost a month now but im still not over him. He's all I could ever think about. I don't know what to do. I want the real me to be back again, but it wouldn't. Its hard to smile. He looks soo soo happy without me. It break me into millions of pieces. It made me realize that love is shitload of bullshit. I honestly don't believe in love anymore. I mean why? No matter how loving or caring that person is to you, they will break you in the end. Those people out there that are experiencing heartbreak, don't worry. Your not the only one. Im trying my hardest to stay strong. Let's just believe in ourself, have faith in God. And never say never


       

Brooke

January 21, 2014 @ (California)

Tags: break up


My sophomore year of high school I met a guy, it all started when he threw his football jersey at me and asked me to wear it to the game that night. I barley knew him at the time but sure enough we dated for almost two year afterwards. At the end of my junior year we had been fighting a bit more than usual but nothing out of the ordinary. One day he asked to hang out and within 40 minutes received a text then said he was leaving to go to a party he had forgotten about. I called him out on it and we didn't speak or text for a week afterwards. I finally texted him first and came to my house to talk, our conversation lasted no longer than 5 minutes and we haven't spoken since. It's been 8 months. Over those 8 months I've texted him 3 times trying to make some kind of friendship and he never wants anything to do with it. He blocked me out and pretended I never happened. He was my best friend and the closest I have ever been to someone and I guess that's why I respect his choice and I haven't bothered him. He has a new girlfriend now who he likes to bring back to basketball games at my school (keep in mind he graduated and I haven't) and when I do run into him refuses to make eye contact. Due to his actions I would never want to take him back but I still wish I could have at least made a friendship out of the two years with him.


       

James

January 17, 2014 @ (Australia)

Tags: Bad breakup, Sad, feeling lost and confused


We actually met when I was with my ex at the time a gf of almost 3 years and we were not happy at all and I was going to break up with ex. While out walking my dog I met a really cool chick in whom I had a connection with and shared alot of interests. Anyway over bumping into her on walks over a series of months some things happened and took place that seemed like fate and like were mean't to be together so I took a chance and ended it with my ex for another chance to be happy with a girl that appeared to be my "most ideal". We hung out and had an instant connection, strongest intital connection I've ever had with a girl ever ! Although when were hanging out (not dating yet) she told me a story how she has problems hugging her own parents and with displaying public affection, which waved a red flag in my head but I ignored it. We started dating but we rushed things along way too fast which was bad. We spend a whole week together never happier by the two week mark she had moved in with me and "we" and our dogs were all getting along and it was the best times ever we had plans for the future because everything felt right and mean't to be. In the 2 months I was dating her we were so happy and she was affectionate then 6 days days ago she was so distant no kissing no cuddling no touching, sex virtually no talking at all, almost nothing at all, this went on for about 7 days I couldn't understand it ? I am missing a point here she had troubles with affection in general as I found out. She never displayed affection in public except a few hand holdings under sufference though she was really affectionate behind closed doors. She kept telling me I am not a normal girl and I don't like affection and had excuses for no longer wanting to kiss and cuddle or even spend any time at all together really. Prior to this she was very affectionate for almost the 2months even though she said she has problems with affection. So I ended up making the decision to break up with her yesterday, I still don't understand what happened she was with me almost all the time and had no car so she never cheated also appeared very genuine and sweet, I don't know why she completely shut off and all affection and caring and everything was just suddenly gone. Our breakup was messy she was really cold and sarcastic and I said you owe me an explanation..what happened why were you happy and affectionate for 2 months and now nothing, just shut off and distant ? she said "I dont owe you s@#t ! " and eventually "I just don't have one an explanation an answer I wish I did" just before I broke up with her she posted on facebook I don't know if I'll ever be affectionate like everyone else is.....I should of seen all this coming from spotting the first red flag indicating the sign that she has problems with affection. Right now I kind of feel lost and confused and I will never have the satisfaction of knowing what happened, what changed, I'll never understand it !


       

Dustin

January 09, 2014 @ (Ontairo)

Tags: Bad breakup, Sad


We originally met moving into the same house together, where she was originally dating her boyfriend at the time. We started doing a lot of things together and she broke up with her boyfriend and started dating me. It always kinda scared me that she'd do it again.
We lived together for about a year and a half, where I got a job far away across Canada. I became really distant, and I kinda stopped caring for things, I was doing my own thing. I met a girl there and we hung out a bit, but it seemed I was ignoring my originally girlfriend more and more.
Eventually my girlfriend saw this and heard about this, and it got really intense and she got really sad and broke up with me...I didn't seem to mind at first, but then a week later it hit me what I had done. I phoned her, and she was at another guys house. I never cried so much in my life. I begged for her to come back, I never cheated technically, I'd do anything.
I still wish her back everyday when I wake up, It's been about 6 months now.


       

Emily

January 07, 2014 @ (usa)

Tags: bad break up


We started dating last year, everything was perfect. He was my everything, my first love, and he made me the happiest girl in the world. I was so proud to call him mine and everything was amazing. We never fought, we made each other laugh all the time and there was never a dry moment. We got along so well and every day I loved him more and more. We saw each other every day last summer and we were both sad because in August we would be going our separate ways for college. We spent so much time together in July and August and we both loved each other so much. I truly believed he was the love of my life and that we were meant to be and he thought the same. We swore our love forever to each other the day I left for college and I really believed the distance wouldn't hurt our strong relationship. After a few weeks in college it was clear we were becoming kind of distant. I was so sad because I put him over almost everything and i tried to talk to him and tell him I was thinking about him all the time, but I felt like I never received anything in return. I felt unappreciated and kind of worthless to him. I saw him a few times and he didn't even seem sad to say bye to me. It seemed like he had completely moved on with his life and forgotten about me. He insisted that he still loved me but was just really busy, and I believed him. He always talked about this other girl but said they were just really good friends. I was suspicious that they were maybe more than friends but I didn't do anything about it because I didn't believe he could do anything like that to me. He would always hang out with this girl and I would see pictures of them together and it made it seem like my worst fears were coming true.. he was falling for another girl behind my back. I tried talking about this other girl and our relationship and i told him i felt kind of neglected, but he said I was breaking his heart and I mistakingly said I made a mistake and didn't know he still loved me so much. We continued to talk but he rarely did anything to make me smile or make me happy. I felt like I wasn't talking to the guy i loved. I saw him over holiday break and after spending a few wonderful days with him he told me he liked this other guy. "I like him, but I love you," he told me. It was probably the worst thing I've ever been told in my entire life. We had spent the whole week mending our relationship and being happy together, only for him to drop this horrible news on me at the end of the break. I then made the biggest mistake of my life, I continued to spend the rest of the weekend with him and act like things were okay. He had me under his spell and was playing and manipulating me. I knew I had to break up with him, I wasn't going to be his back up in case things with this new girl didn't work. He clearly didn't know what "love" meant and was deceiving me the whole time. My gut feeling knew he liked this other girl I just didn't want to believe it. About a year after we fell for each other, I broke up with him after the weekend was over. It was so difficult I cried every night. I still think about him every single day, but I knew I didn't deserve to be treated like that and in time i'll find someone better.


       

Jenny

January 06, 2014 @ (Georgia)

Tags: bad breakup


My bf and i went out for 1 year and 6 months. He had broken up with me twice before and i was stupid and went back to him for the third time. Anyways, recently he's been working A LOT and it started affecting our relationship. He didn't even make an effort to talk to me or anything so i finally decided to call him. I asked him what was going on and he told me he has just been really busy lately and that he doesn't have time for anything, including a relationship. He was my first love and i will always love him.


       

123

December 21, 2013 @ (uk)

Tags: heartbreak bad break up


So this summer I went on a language course in valencia. And on my last night i met this beautiful polish girl. The school I was going to had arranged a dinner and I wanted to sit with all my friends but the only space was next to her, who I had previously not met. Anyway, we started talking and got on really well all through the evening, at the start I didnt think she liked me but I realized she did when I kept catching her looking at me when my head was turned away. The next day I came back to UK and we started talking loads on facebook and skype. Skyping her was always the best part of my day. We spoke for about three weeks like that all the time her saying yeh you should come see me in poland ! So i thought about it and eventually got round to booking my tickets and eventually went to see her for a weekend. We had the best weekend ever and got on amazingly well, slept together every night and talked about how much we liked each other and how cute we were and how amazing this whole situation was. She said she had not felt like this with anyone for a really long time and that she felt so comfortable with me which was weird as it usually takes her much longer to get so comfy and like someone so much. She was basically the first proper girl I had done anything like this with, so it made me feel really good and she said how special I made her feel and how I gave her shivers down her spine. Basically, I was head over heals for her and she genuinely seemed to like me as much as I liked her. I came back and a few days after we skyped and I bought my tickets to go back in about a month and a half's time. The first few weeks were fine, although I missed her loads and thought about her all the time we spoke loads and she always said how much she couldn't wait to see me and that she adored me and that she wanted me and how much she wanted to kiss me and hug me etc, considering this was my first girl I was basically in this amazing haze of happiness, everything just felt so good. But as time went on I think we both began to realize the reality of the situation. Neither of us wanted anything serious or it to be more than a bit of fun, but at the same time I think she fell for me as much as I did her. We began to text a bit less as she got busier and things started to slow down, and even skyping wasn't so great anymore. One night we skyped and I told her that I didn't think things were going to work out well and that there was no way that they could and that the whole situation was a bit stupid. The next week was terrible we barely spoke and when we did it was awkward. The more I thought about it that more things didn't make sense espeically as we weren't even properly going out or together or anything. I did try to hold thingks on since I had already bought my dam tickets but she began to be really cold and distant and said she had been on dates with some guy, which although we did agree was fine that if we see someone we like we should go for it, although it did make me feel like shit as she knew i had bought my tickets to go there in just a few weeks time. It eventually ended when she told me she was seeing some guy and that we could only be friends if I came to see her, and that it wasn't the fact she was seeing someone else it was the fact its too difficult to maintain anything even though everything she said was true. Although I understood and knew deep down it was always going to end badly, I still felt terrible as it was a week before I was meant to go and I thought it was bad how she started seeing someone knowing I had booked everything and more that she accused me of becoming too attached, when she had told me all this stuff and that it was true...I will never understand why she couldn't see that. I haven't spoken to her since and don't intend to, but it really sucked at the time, cried for three days straight and generally just felt completely empty and destroyed and completely unhappy and without meaning or drive. Although we werent official or anything it still sucked, but it does feel good to get it off my chest ! word of warning, the first experience with a girl / women will never end well, beware that they also can say shit and then the complete opposite a few days later....definitely scared of getting involved with anyone else for the time being !


       

Broken Hearted Girl...

December 19, 2013 @ (Philadelphia )

Tags: Sad


When I first saw him I was stunned he was so sexy and tall with braids .... we starting talking but then something stupid happened and we stopped. We wound up in the same school and started talking again then eventually dating ... I knew instantly he was someone special .. we soon fell in love and things were going well ... but he had many secrets and he lied multiple times .... over and over and over ... he still thinks to this day that I believe all the lies he too but I just let him believe .. so we were on and off and I just kept going back because I really love him ... but I guess it just wasn't ment to be :( I still love him to this day but we don't really talk any more .. I git kicked out of my school so I don't see him any more ... it hurts really badly and I want him back ... I don't understand why though ... I want to know how he feels ... or at least how he felt ... I wish he knew :(