Searching for "pen"

414 Results For 'pen'

Jolene

January 02, 2012 @ (Aus)

Tags: 1

We weren't together long, probably only over a month and the relationship felt kind of rushed, as if everything just went way too fast. It isn't as if I regret anything about the relationship as it happened, I just think it would've turned out better if it didn't go so fast.
Anyway, all of a sudden when the holidays began we saw each other less and less. I was told that he was working too much and he was too tired to see me. When I asked about our lack of communication he said that he was just too tired and that I never really talked to him. It was frustrating and despairingly I attempted a sort of silent approach interspersed with periods of strained conversation (not face to face). I have no idea how any of this was supposed to help and so I just left it. He didn't 'have time' to see me...okay, then I'll just go on and assume that he's just not interested anymore.
So basically my breakup was a prolonged period of confusion in which the dumper let me work it out for myself that we were no longer together. Whether this method of indirect break up was an act of cowardice, laziness or (seriously misguided) kindness I don't know. We still talk occasionally through social networks and such and are supposedly 'friends' in a weird way that feels like nothing meaningful. I don't feel any resentment towards him (or try not to) because this stuff happens and people lose interest. Except I hope that when it does happen most people explain this to the persons' face and don't let them painstakingly figure it out for themselves.

Brynn

December 31, 2011 @ (bacolod)

Tags: 123

Hey.I'm ladiesman from philippines(obviously just an alias). It's my first time to experience this kind of pain from a break-up, cause I've invested too much on this woman. We got into a relationship through a dare game, in a text message. We got along,flirted,calling each other every 10:00 in the evening, been making out 4 times.., but never had an actual sex(just oral). The thin g with our relationship is she doesn't want to go out with me in public, telling me that she doesn't want her friends to know about it and that they will be shocked, I've also asked her about the guys that had been tecting her and calling her, and she would just tell me that these guys are nothing to worry about. Deep inside me I know that she's hiding something from me, but everytime I've asked her about this one she would always tell me the same thing, that I don't need to worry, they are just old acquaintances/ friends. It got to a point that I couldn't take this kind of thing anymore, and that I wanted our relationship to be open, so I told her about it, we broke up, and after an hour I told her that I was sorry and I want her back again. She just agreed, but starting that time, things got weird. She would not call me every 10:00 in the evening like what she's gonna be doing before, always delayed or sometimes not replying on my text messages anymore, started to make excuses for us not to meet, it was too much for me that I tried to call her for 33 times, she didn't answered back then. She then texted me on why have I called her for that many number of times, and I told her that I thought she was trying to avoid me, she was pissed, and told me that she's starting to lose interest on me because of what i did, and that caused our break up. I still made an effort to contact her, and even called her once asking for one more chance, but she told me that she just wants to be alone during christmas, and that she won't be giving me a chance
"for now" she says. 3 days passed, i never texted her but I would still call her from time to time, cause I was badly missing our daily routine of calling each other, and also spending time with her too...The last time that she answered the phone, after my 5 attempted calls in one day, she said"hello?...., I'm still busy", and then she dropped the phone. That hurted like hell for me. I felt like it's really 100% over already. I couldn't get over it that much, i became a paranoid and tried to seek advice from a lot of people around me, even those that I don't know. It came to a point that I've realized that I'm starting to get over it already, and had been trying to check her fb walls if there are other guys posting some stuffs. Lo and behold, there was a guy that I really have doubts to have a sexual reltionship with her that posted in her wall, I checked his fb account, checked on the pictures and his walls, and there I've discovered that my girl was actually trying to flirt, and chase the guy(cause he's a model) and had been posting a lot of flirty comments to each other since the day that my girl and I started making out(only lasted for about 2 months and a couple of weeks). Right now, I already consider her as a bitch, and is still trying to move on from the lies that she's been doing to me. I never realized that she's this kind of person, but a girl like this are the type to just be thrown away and be ignored(that's what my ego tells me to do....), and that's what I'm trying to do right now. Thing is, she still has a small boobs and a smelly cunt, so, I wanna wish the other guys who's gonna be meeting with her vagina a goodluck.

Eldon Matashaw

December 30, 2011 @ (Lebanon Missouri)

Tags: love, marriage, god

I am lost in my heart and my soul. I am very active in my church and I spend a great deal of time proselytizing to help bring others to Christ. Ever since I was 14 our minister has taken a special hand in my learning of Gods will and ways. He even encouraged me to date his adopted daughter Svetlana after he brought her here from Russia. A couple of years later, Pastor Williams encouraged me to marry Svetlana even though we were both still in school. We were married when I was 16 and she was 14. I was nervous as I was a virgin on our wedding night and I wanted to take it slow but Svetlana was very insistant that we have sex. We made love once, then she never wanted to do it any more. 6 months later our beautiful daughter Kima was born, 8 lbs 4 ounces and looked just like her mother. Pastor Williams was so helpful always offering to look after my wife and baby when ever he sent me out to spread the word of God. I had to leave school, because Pastor told me God spoke to him and said I was to be his beacon in the land to guide folks to his eternal love. I was often gone from home for many days and sometimes weeks as Pastor gave me instructions on where to spread His word. One day I was traveling near our home town, so I decided to stop in to see my family. When I went in to our trailer, I found my wife and Pastor Williams asleep in our bed. I could see they were both naked. I was so confused and I left without saying anything. A few days later, I talked to Pastor about it and he said the two of them had been praying and speaking in tongues. They had both been so posessed by the spirit, they chose to bare themselves to the Lord. He assured me that they had not engaged in fornication and that they both were just so exhausted they fell asleep. I believed him because I know he would never lie as it is a sin. Well, last week I found out Svetlana is pregnant again and her and I have not had sex since our wedding night. When I asked the Pastor for guidance, he told me I needed to "man up" and take care of my family. He explained to me that some women can carry a mans seed for years and have several children from only one mating. But then a sister in the church told me that she knew Pastor and my wife were committing adultry and that Pastor is actually the father of my Kima and my unborn child. I dont know who to believe, but I am so hurting in my soul. I think this may be the Lord testing me, or perhaps Satan trying to destry another of God's unions. I asked Svetlana to be truthful with me, and she just left and went to tell Pastor that I am being sinful in mistrusting her. I got on the internet to seek answers and somehow wound up on this site. I see so much pain here, and somehow feel kinship with it. But I also want you all to know, God loves you all, and he wants only your happiness. God has a plan. May he bless us all, Amen.

Ash

December 20, 2011 @ (India)

Tags: My story

Hi all, at last found a site where i can spill my feelings. It all stated 8 years back. My neighbour boy (who calls me big bro) was my very good friend since childhood. He is 4 years younger to me and was doing BDS (bachelor in Dental Surgery). He had a senior girl in the college whom he respected as a elder sister. In many conversations he used to cite her examples. I became influenced towards this girl and asked him to give me her mobile number. Upon a promise that i wont play with the girls feelings, he gave me the number. After many attempts to make the girl talk to a stranger, she finally felt comfortable talking to me. Our relationship grew on phone and though we hadn't seen each other, the inter bond kept growing. Then one fine day, we decided to meet. On the first look, it was love at first site for both of us. Whenever she had to go her college in the other distant city, i used to drop her to the next city bus stand. Shopping together, going into malls..... all was like a dream. Then after 3 years, i asked her to ask her parents for marriage as i was very keen to get married to her and so she was. She belonged to a hindu brahmin family which had a staunch belief in astrology. When her parents asked my birth details, i gave them my true details. Although i knew our horoscopes don't match, still i wanted to marry her on truth and not on a bed of lies. Her father told me that since she was a manglik (an astrological condition) and i was not she could be married to a manglik boy only. We both tried to convince them for 2 long years but they didnt agreed. Although i am well educated and placed at a high position in an MNC, they said a straight "NO" to me. She even tried suicide thrice to convince them but they didnt agreed. After that, she started avoiding my calls. As our relation was entering its seventh year, my family told me that they can'nt wait any longer and my mother being hyper tensive, wanted the things to be settled at this end or the other. Finally, we went to see her father to convince him about my love but a straight NO was his answer. I was heartbroken as the girl stopped picking up my calls. I went through a three month anti depression course. Then my family finalised some other girl for me and got me married. After two years of marriage and a son, my ex again came in contact with me. She is still single, has crossed 30 years of age and is repenting on her decision to go as per her parents decision. She says that she always loved me and avoided my phone calls just to make me hate her and to make me move on with my life. Although i have got a loving wife but the place which i had given to my ex, i wont be able to give it to anyone. I am trying to pull on with life without my wife knowing it but it is like getting born and dying every day. Now my ex's parents are searching for a boy but for her too it will be just another compromise that she will be making. How people shatter lives of lovers in India just on the pretext that the astrological horoscopes dont match is a lifelong nightmare for lovers. Neither the children nor the parents nor the ones to whom they get married ever stay happy just because of this sick mentality of horoscope matching. Life is hell without the one whom you love so deeply, whom you have visualised and imagined in each and every moment in your coming life, in all your future times. Life is truly a hell.

Miss

December 14, 2011 @ (Clagary)

Tags: example 1

So I knew him since I was in grade five, he dated my best friends' older sister for 3 years, I never thought about him romantiaclly back then, and never really thought I would. They broke up but stayed friends, they are still friends to this day.
When I was 16 my best friend and I started hanging out with her older sister her friends (him included). I didnt really think of him that way stil, until one night my friend told me he was texting her and told her that he thought I was the most beautiful girl hes ever seen, he was shy of me I guess. (But he didnt have a reason to be)I was surprised and excited and I felt awesome. I decided to go try talking to him, when I did he still acted shy around me. But he eventually let down a little of his shyness and started talking and acting more freely around me. Then one day, we were sitting in the backyard with a few of his friends, when all of a sudden they all just started dispersing, once everyone else had cleared he took my hand and asked me if I wanted to be his girlfriend. It was so cute; planned out. I said yes. He was so amazing to me in our first few months, he was my first, and he didnt push me, and I thought everything was perfect. Then we started fighting. All he wanted to do was spend time with his friends and never even thought to invite me to come. I was seeing him twice a week at most, and our sex life was faltering to say the least. We broke up a few times, off and on again and again. I was the first one to break up with him, he begged me back, cried and pleaded. He seemed like he was actually sorry, so I did. About a year later (off and on) one of his friends started seeing this girl who they met one night at the bar. She seemed alright, not goodlooking by any stretch, but she had something in her personality I guess. I was going to mexico, we were all talking about it one night and this new girl was like " so are we going to be going snowboarding while our partners are in mexico?" and he kind of brushed it off, like he didnt want me to be around while they made plans. It kinda got me going, and all the times he brought her up. Once I actually was losing my mind about it and decided to ask him if he had a thing for her. He brushed it off and said she was annoying...

A few months later she and his friend broke up.

We broke up again, like normal I thought we would get back together again, we talked, made plans and he blew me off. Then one night there was a party, I had to work that night so I couldnt attend. But my friend was there. The next morning she called me and told me that he showed up there with her. I was frantic. I went over to his house. His roommate answered the door and told me he wasnt home. I asked if I could get a few of my things, she let me in.
I went into his room and ther on the floor was her bag, a pair of nasty panties and a bunch of her shit. Oh man did I ever want to burn it, but I didnt, instead I just grabbed everything I ever gave him, and left. I went on a vacation. He texted me a few months ago, and I stupidly replied trying to be just his friend. He texts me now and then telling me how much he misses me, and was stupid. But never really saying anything. Whatever, I have an amazing boyfriend now who I have been dating for 6 months and I am happier than I ever was with him.

Wasn\\

December 12, 2011 @ (Edmonton, Alberta)

Tags: 1

I was clear on my intentions when I told the universe what I wanted "Somebody who loves me as I am" and he showed up. He was funny, flirty, nervous, self conscious and lacked confidence. Why? God knows because he was handsome, fit, funny and available. We worked together and at first i did not want to work with him because he had a sarcastic and surly streak, but over time he won me with his charm. It was an intense and passionate love right from the start, but i had to acknowledge that even with all his flirting, I was the one who asked him out. He reciprocated and we had afternoon dates over lunch and long walks. then we started sleeping together and I told him that I loved him. That didn't go over very well. We dated steadily for 2 months when he went on a holiday. The people he was going to meet up with seemd a strange mix but I didn't know him that well at the time.

Turns out he met up with a woman from his past who drifted into the spot of "platonic friend." I said he needed to make clear his intentions with her. She kept calling and he kept answering.
Then she became this regular part of his/our life but she lived in the states so was far removed. I started to get jealous and we had our first of many break ups over his lack of honesty and the way he painted the picture of her involvement in his life. i was in love with him, saw him every day at work and couldn't break free form his emotional pull. I took a transfer. that worked for a week or two and then we started speaking again and seeing each other again but it was not th same. He started to pint out my flaws, I saw his evasiveness and aloof behaviour more clearly. We started to disagree. Eventually i watched him openly flirt with another woman at a cocktail party and knew that it was time to move on. He denied it of course, called me jealous, said I was hot and cold with him. We had tickets to the company Christmas party so agreed to still go together. there was no magic anymore. He won a door prize of jewellery at the party and reluctantly gave it to me. My co-workers thought his distance was strange. I tried so hard not to belittle him or be angry with him but it was hard. He drove me home, we said our goodbyes, he was cold and distant, the man I knew hm to be in the beginning, the man i didn't want to work next to. I asked him why he would start dating me again if he wasn't that interested. He said he was sorry about that. And then it was over. Now I'm working on a different floor and working through this breakup so that I can continue on in finding love. I just wasn't clear in my intentions.

Sugar Is Sweet

December 08, 2011 @ (Sunshine State)

Tags: Lonely,

My boyfriend and I dated for over a year and a half.

He cooked for us, was very sweet, obviously cared for me a lot. Always did little things to make me happy.

He didn't talk very well, I would ask him questions, tried to use positive reinforcement to get him to talk about his feelings. Cause I think that's important.

I analyze everything, he tends to not think about it.

I wanted to have sex more, his libido wasn't as strong as mine.

I wanted to hang out with my family, he never felt like it.

I wanted to spend more time together, it never seemed to work out.

There were things I could have worked on, too. But by the end of our relationship, even when we were together, I felt terribly alone.

I miss his touch, his kisses, his sweet words. I miss almost everything that reminds me of him, I miss him with everything I have.

But I know I made the right decision. Goodbye, love.

Katie

December 02, 2011 @ (Here crying)

Tags: Here crying

Ok, so I met this guy and at first I wasnt keen on him but he was really into me, got my number and we started talking. So he would tell me things like how much he wanted to be with me, how he would never let me go, and that he was falling in love with me. So eventually, I began liking him and wanted to be with him and start a relationship with him. So he asked me to be his girlfriend and I was ecstatic and said yes. The next day, he dumped me for his best-friend. So I was hurt completely and I spent an entire day crying..why the hell would he do that?

Flyyy

November 28, 2011 @ (United Kingdom)

Tags: Reunion

So this isn't a break up, but a follow up to a post i put on here before. After all the shit between my girlfriend and i we ended up sleeping together for a couple weeks until finally getting back together. After not speaking to each other for two years we managed to fix everything. Four months on and we are actually living together now. I obviously always hoped this would happen but never really expected it. So this shows that sometimes great things do happen. I couldn't be happier =]

Pixie

November 25, 2011 @ (United Kingdom)

Tags: confused, hurt, lost, change, embarrassing

We met in September 2010, at a friend's flat party. He whisked me off to the Isle of Skye for three days of surreal relaxation. We didn't even know each other but both wanted an adventure. I was his after that.

The next year was one of the best. Truly, I was so happy. He was my best friend, we spent most of our time together. He wrote me songs, letters, drew me pictures. I visited his family, he met mine, we all got on. Not one person in my life disliked him. We never argued, and he knew me better than anybody else.

However, this September, things changed. He became more interested in University work and University friends. I can understand that completely, we live in different cities, about 40 minutes apart, but he had literally no time for me, and reminded me of that constantly. He told me to put up with it for the next year and a half.

Things exploded and we broke up over the phone. He then phoned me ten times, I ignored, and he turned up at my flat, on the verge of tears, with a letter saying how sorry he is and how he realises now that he was wrong. I told him we both need to take a bit of room to breathe.

A week later, I asked him to meet up for a coffee, expecting him to be in a similar, apologetic mind set, and with hopes we could find a new way forward, things were going to change. Instead, he told me his life is a lot less stressful without me. "It's not that I don't like you" he said, and proceeded to talk about how we should be friends because we get on so well. He showed no emotion whatsoever. I met him at 3 and was waiting for a train home by 20 past 3. He told me about the "cool" parties he's been to with his friends and the nights he has planned, how some girl was nipping his thigh at the last one and being very weird with him.

I didn't show any emotion. I was relentlessly 'nice' because I didn't want him to have all of the power, or anything to hold against me. Now I'm just trying to pick up the pieces.