Searching for "mean"

186 Results For 'mean'

Lonely Lifelong

April 08, 2013 @ (canada)

This guy was with me for almost a year,but it doesn't matter to me how long or short,i loved him with all my heart and thats what matters,he was my first love and i cant express how much i loved him,what didnt i do for him....but i never asked for more then his love,all i needed was his love,but maybe he never did.

i begged him,pleaded him,but he never replied for anything,sometimes i think that the time we have been togather was a lie,we were never meant to be,i cant believe he did this to me,he has made me feel like the luckiest girl,and on the top of the universe,he made me believe he loved me like anything,but he never did,i wonder how could he do this to me?my only question is why?

Now i only have one of his most beautiful memories we shared,that reminds me of the times we had,our girl baby,she is the most beautiful thing i've seen,when we brokeup i didnt knw i was pregnant,after he left me i came to know and i was really happy,i tried to contect him,but he never listened,he doesn't even know that there is a baby,he even doesn't know where we are,i don't want him to know also,he betrayed me,cheated me.

The feeling of keeping the baby inside me was the most amazing,the way it grew,every second reminded me of him,i still do want him,really badly,lastweek my girly for the first time called dada,and tears filled my eyes,she is very alike to her father,those eyes,those soft lightbrown straight hair,she is only one and half,her small feets put little steps towards me,her every thing reminds me of him,and it makes me happy too.

i wish he would be happy,successfull,and he gets the love he wants,god bless him everyway,i loved him,love him,and will go on loving him forever,now my problem is my bestfriend wants me,but i never thought about loving anyone after him,its not that i didn't try,i did,but cant,i believe its better not to love than loving someone who'll never love you back,i feel as if you love soomeone you will pay for it your lifelong......

So though i am alone,its better to be alone,and live a lonelylife,the reason i am living only is for my babydaughter,she is my life,in my every breath she exists,nothing can harm her as long as i live,i have never let her even fall simply,i've kept her in my arms and looked after her,she is the reason i am,all i am is for her,and i will never let her go through what i went,i've promised this to my self since i knew she was within me.....

i love you my darling,my baby,my girl,my only princess...

Kali

March 24, 2013 @ (United States)

Tags: not understanding, sadness.

I figure typing this out would probably do good for my heart, so I have decided to tell you all about my quite recent (only a few hours ago but still had enough time to linger in my head) breakup.

This boy was literally my childhood friend. Bad idea, I know, but I digress. He meant the world to me as a kid, and we just recently re-met each other after not speaking for years. The chemistry was sorta ... instant.

However, obviously, it didn't last.
We spent the few days we were together talking, and talking, and talking. I actually felt like he really cared about me. Just the mentioning of his name made me smile and blush.

He and I had so much in common, we still do. Our religious beliefs, music, art..
I thought I had really made it good, that for once, someone would stay with me.

Obviously that couldn't happen.
I get a text late into the night - and it said it was him, and that he wanted to end our relationship because he "wasn't ready for one." Me, usually reacting quite the opposite of how I normally would've, take the passive approach toward him, saying "I'm fine, I understand."

I later on then cried, and cried, and then something quite stupid. Cut myself. I couldn't sleep, due to the pain in my legs (one of the places I had decided to cut,) and my little depression I had going on.

So to any girl, or boy, or whomever is going through a breakup, don't get to down. We're just one step closer to finding our one ticket to happiness.
Regardless as to however they broke up with you, it happened for a reason. Heck, you never know, you could end up with them again in the future.
You just gotta wait it out and roll your dice.

~Kali

Breakfastclub

February 27, 2013 @ (Kansas)

Tags: exbf, manipulator, liar, selfish

My ex boyfriend and I broke up about 2 and a half years ago, but all this time we never stopped talking. We remained in a sexual relationship all this time. During this time he treated me poorly, then we would fight and then he would treat me better... until the next fight. He always knew what to say and how to act to calm me down and convince that he cared for me. During this time he talked to 3 other girls, and in all the occasions I told him I didn't want to talk to him anymore, but he would insist in staying in my life. We had a bad fight in all three occasions and then once things started not working out with the girl he would apologize saying he recognized he didn't treat me well. I have asked him several times to stay away, to let me go, and he would for a couple of weeks but then he would come back and I was enough of an idiot to let him back in. Well in December I told him we should stop seeing each other, then he said "ok" but soon started messaging me saying he wanted to see me once I got home from Christmas break. Then we hung out a couple of times in January, but then he started being really rude to me so I told him to not talk to me anymore. We hadn't talked to me in a while and then I (was being stupid again) texted him saying I was ok with us not talking but I wanted to understand why. Then he replied "get over me, i'm talking to a girl in high school" (detail: we are both 22 and college students). I laughed because that's just pathetic. Well the next week I saw him at a dance at our college, and I was a little tipsy and in a bad mood and angry at him so I walked by him and pumped into him. He texted me all angry, but then the next morning he was being all sweet saying I look beautiful at the dance and that he wanted to see me. So I said "what about your high schooler?" then he replied "Oh I lied, I just said that to piss you off". I knew he was lying about that, I know he actually talked to her and I knew she had probably dumped him already. Well,I didn't let him come over to my apartment. I didn't want to see him at all. Then I realized on his twitter that he was talking to her again so I asked him "why did you lie about not talking to her?" then he answered "i don't have to explain anything to you" (wow, dick). Well after that we talked a couple more times and then I noticed there was nothing wrong because of some things he posted on twitter. Then we were talking and he said someone screwed things up. Well it was obviously her. Then a few days later I drove by his house (which is right across from my apartment) and I saw a car there, so I asked if it was hers and he said yes. Well I got pissed out and said terrible things to him. We argued bad, I told him he was nothing to me, and I regretted having let him in back in my life so many times, he got really mad when I said that and then he told me he didn't want to talk to me anymore. Then the next day we argued again and this time he told me "shut up, don't talk to me, don't talk about me, and don't talk about her". I know I screwed up in a few aspects, but in no way I'm blaming myself for what did. He lied to me several times, and he manipulated me to get just what he wanted. He is the most selfish and egocentric person I have ever met. All he thinks is about himself. Now that he is happy with her there is no way in hell that he will apologize for the mean things he said to me. What I heard is that she is a little high school slut, so I guess she is a good fit for him. I know I deserved some of it, but he was never considering towards my feelings. We were still kinda up in the air, and he knew I had feelings for him, and he didn't understand when I tried to explain why I was mad/upset. He pretty much said "this is your problem, not mine, deal with it". This last couple of weeks have been tough, but I will not let him bring me down. I am starting to see that I didn't lose anything, I actually won, because I got rid of an abusive, manipulative boy and now I am free to find a man, who can care for me and be what my ex could never be.

N\a

February 20, 2013 @ (narnia )

Tags: can't even

I don't really know why I felt compelled to do this, but i mean why not. basically, me and this guy were together for about 10 months and i've never been more comfortable around a person ever. stupidly, i thought we were "perfect" for each other if there is such a thing but i was happy and i had let my guard down... which was also stupid because i know that only leads to being even more hurt at the end. anyways, everything was great and i'll always appreciate everything he's done for me but he's now lost every single ounce of my respect. I realized he began to change over the summer and there were several red flags that the relationship was going downhill. but of course, i didn't want it to end so i dealt with more bullshit than i ever should have put up with and i realize that now. but oh well, can't change that. come september (i think..) we had both changed. for me, it was due to an excessive amount of stress. school had just started again and my family problems had begun to escalate once again so obviously i wasn't myself but i thought i had him there to fall back on considering that's what i was led to believe. we started getting into arguments more often, sometimes my fault, sometimes his; we were both at fault. but when we spent time together on the weekends, which he always kept pushing for, everything was fine and arguments were almost non existent. so of course, i wasn't thinking about how badly i was about to get dumped. not even a week before he broke up with me, he had asked me to our school dance a month away on a night we had spent outside with a fire and smores, and laughing blablabla. a day or two after that he had asked me to his cousin's birthday party, even further than a month away and i had gladly accepted both offers. this gave me reason to believe that everything was gonna settle out again, i mean who wouldn't think that right? A couple days later, he dumped me & the night before that he told me that he still "loved" me (quotes because i hate that word). As he was breaking up with me, he was crying and gave me three excuses as to why he was doing it including stress sports and family pressure and he couldn't balance me in the equation. he also dropped the "but we're best friends. we can still be best friends" bomb on me at the same time and demanded hugs from me and also said that the past two weeks didn't feel the same to him. sometime during that two week period he had snuck over from about 1 in the morning till 6. honestly, i'm still confused about everything. & it gets worse. he texted me THREE times that night asking how i was and telling me about his family arguments and whatever and i was just like um what.

Lucy

February 20, 2013 @ (Clarksville, AR)

Tags: example1, example2

So this breakup story teens could probly relate to more. So me and this guy got together at the begining of the school year, he is my first boyfriend. He tried to flirt with me and he kept annoying me for about a week because he wanted to go out with me so bad. I had a few feelings for him so we gave it a shot,everything was going smoothly when about two weeks after we started going out he accused me of cheating on him with one of my friends. So I broke up with him to see if maybe he just needs some time so we broke up friday and got together on Monday. We went out for about three months and then he was being mean to my friends, me, and he accused me AGAIN for cheating on him. So we brokeup again and i asked him if he still wanted to be friends and he said "No, i don't think it will work out" and i said" You don't think i have a good reason to breakup with you do you"? and he said " No you don't"and i was about to explode right there in front of thirty people so I just went and sat down. Later on in the day i cheaked my email and i had an email from him and it said " Someone once told me that having someone that you love as a friend and in your life is better then not having them in your life at all". So we were friends for about two weeks and then things took a turn for the worst. He called me a Re Re and a B word and he told me to go puck myself. He was emailing me on the school email so he had to change the f to a p so he wouldn't get in trouble. He was trying to make me jelouse by asking two of my best friends out and that made things ten times worse. He keeps asking if we can get back together but he knows i have nothing new to say to him. So I have not talked to him in three weeks, but he keeps emailing but i have the strangth not to email him back. So if your ex wants you back and you and me have a similar story then he probley dosen't really like you. If they don't respect, appreciate, and value you then they don't deserve you. Stay strong I belive in you. Also if I miss spell something I am sorry. Good luck :)

Alexis

November 14, 2012 @ (Florida)

Tags: regret

Well it all started with this guy. He is a little bit younger than me. He is really sweet and a really great guy, but there is just one thing. He acts really annoying and immature sometimes. I fell in love with him though, he was my first real relationship. However, throughout the relationship I found myself loving him one day and then just hating him the next. He got on my last nerves sometimes. I had considered breaking up with him many times but I knew that he was really in love with me and I couldn't bring myself to do it. So one day me and my friends were all talking and his name came up in the conversation, I was telling them how he was really starting to act immature and annoying and thats when I decided I just couldnt handle it anymore. I could let him keep loving me and me holding back. I didn't know how to break it to him without hurting him though. So I decided that the best way was just to start a rumor that he was talking to other girls, BIG mistake. I knew it was wrong but I just couldn't tell him the truth. I thought that he would believe it since someone had already told me rumors about him before. The next day at school my he found out that the rumor was false and he got really mad. And on top of all that my friend told him I cheated on him while we were dating, she completely stabbed me in the back. She told him I made out with a guy at a party. It wasn't true, I was at my cousins birthday party and we were playing truth or dare, I got a dare to kissed this kid on the cheek. So I did, it wasn't a big deal, he was like 12 and it was just on the cheek. It meant nothing but she changed it all around. I felt terrible, I missed him like crazy and the sad thing is was I broke up with him two days before our 4 month anniversary. I began to realize that he really loved me and he was an amazing guy.My whole world just fell apart,no one understood my decision, not even my parents. I felt like everyone hated me for what I did. I even hated myself. I just wanted to undo it all. I made a stupid decision. I hope one day he will forgive me and maybe we can try to date again but until then I have to deal with the regret and guilt.

Ariana

November 05, 2012 @ (Brooklyn)

Tags: @neveragain

I couldn’t possibly say all the things I wanted to say off the top of my head to you in person so I wrote them down. There are no words to describe how incredibly disappointed and betrayed I feel by you. For once in my life I am able to say that this situation deems me being entirely selfish and not think about anyone else for a chance. Meaning that I really do not care about your feelings or whatever friendship you think you can offer me after this.
You said you were my friend, you said that I was a special person and that you would never want to lose me as a friend. Where was that feeling when you decided to start dating a mutual friend? Someone I considered living with? Someone I would have to constantly see you with in our when our friends hang out? In the library? Where were those morals you held me so high to? You flipped out enough to make me feel like shit when I started dating someone new when we broke up and he wasn't even your friend! The amount of shit that I have put up with because of you is enough to leave me scarred for life. You have hurt me so many times that I’ve stopped counting. There were nights when I lived with my mom that my grandmother heard me crying after an argument with you. I lost all shame when I was with you. But that was not the only thing I lost. I lost trust in other men, I lost self-value, I lost my morale as a woman. Slowly but surely you killed so much in me. But that is not why I am upset or angry with you because I had let that all go. I am mad at you because you tricked me into believing you cared about me and that we were real friends. You lied to me and completely disrespected me and insulted me as a woman. You even threw a jealous temper tantrum after my birthday! You had already started dating her! how dare you?? I thought that if there was anything that we got out of our disfunctional f*cked up relationship was your evolution from a dirtbag who hates women to an actual caring human being. It killed me to see you so hurt and angry at women. Because I thought that in using them like you did, you were just hurting yourself. But I was wrong. You will not change and you live your life to hurt the women around you, to walk around thinking first of your dick rather than your heart. Or even less, hers. I am not your friend, because you do not consider me your friend. I am just former property that you want to keep tabs on. It is sad that I lost who I thought was a friend, but it is even sadder because you lost a genuine friend due to selfishness, arrogance and stupidity. I want to forgive you but I am so hurt and angry right now that I can’t, you don’t deserve it.

Bon

November 05, 2012 @ (United States)

Tags: Heartbroken

I was in a 2 year...almost 3 year relationship with a guy i met and fell in love with. I was 17 at the time so i was young and astonished by how this guy filled up every stupid immature void in my heart. Im 20 now...almost 21 and his friends took him in again and im left to rot. I was always alone while he went to the bar or smoked with his friends. I had friends but didnt know how to go and hang out since i was so used to my boyfriend and putting him first was a must. Today, i had enough. i was with my friends having a great time while he was with his friends. I realized today that my happiness is precious and nothing in this world should interfere with that...so i broke up with him...i mean theres more to it than just an urge to breath and be alone. I know im gonna miss him and i know itll hit me eventually but ill be okay...I have my friends and family. His past got in the way anyways. Im in college, almost done, im ready to take the next step with my life. Its okay right? ill be okay.

I Miss Him

November 02, 2012 @ (OK)

Tags: break up sad death

His name was Joseph. We met & fell in love. He was really sweet and caring. We were only together for a month. He found out his ex was three months pregnant and with twins. So we broke up because of those responsibilities. We tried to get along. But I was really hurt and whenever he would call me I would ignore him. His ex would constantly threaten me telling me that I should stay away from them that I better not ruin her happiness. On my birthday, Joseph came to see me and we ended up arguing over his now fiancee. I cried a lot, it was the worst way to start my 23rd birthday. His babies were born and he still wanted me to be part of his life and asked for forgiveness for all the mean things he said. I forgave him but I told him that I didn't want to be part of his life and to please leave me alone then he told me I was a cold hearted immature girl. We said so many things to each other. I moved on, we lost contact. Then this past May we saw each other at a mutual friends party and he smiled at me and told me I looked beautiful. I looked away and he kissed me and said "I still think about you everyday" I pushed him away and slapped him and told him to never do that again and I left. He went after me and I told him to go away with his wife he said "i didn't marry her" I asked "why?" he said "I don't love her. It doesnt matter if I have kids with her I love them and you but not her" and I said "stop lying! Leave me alone!" & he said "is that what you really want" and I said "yes.." and he said "fine" and he left. Two days ago I receive a call from his mom telling me that he passed away in a car crash and I feel like shit because I wasn't able to tell him how I felt I was just really hurt.I wish I can see him again but it won't ever happen :"(

AL

October 21, 2012 @ (canada)

Tags: first heart break

my gf recently broke up with me and heres the story;
we were together for almost 2yrs and i thought she was the one. my family loves her and she gets along with my friends and vice-versa. she was my longest girlfriend and i let all of my guards down. we recently went on a trip too and i can remember a month before the trip she told me she doesnt feel the same way. but, me, blinded by love i ignored the warning and thought everything was ok and she was just having mood swings. as days, weeks went by she was back to normal. the day of the our 1 week trip comes, we were really happy and in love(atleast i was). so we get back from the trip(it was a great trip) and i thought everything was going fine. its september so we planned to spend the holidays together because my whole family is leaving the country for a month to spend the holidays over-seas. a few weeks after the trip its was september 28 to be exact, i was having a shitty day at work and looking forward to seeing and talking to her. that night, she just wanted to end our relationship, my heart sank while i asked her why and her reasons were: she's still young, she wants to figure herself out, she wants to experience life and she needs her own space. i talked her out of breaking up with me but i would give her a month break to have her space and to do her own thing. i tried to let her do her own thing but i failed, i still called, texted and saw her. that went on for a couple of weeks. she would still say i love you to me but whenever i was with her it didnt feel right anymore i mean i love her but i could just tell that she's fallen out of love with me. i was too stupid to be honest to myself and face that there was no point of me still trying, giving my absolute best to make things work out and make her fall in love again. but she would say the littlest things that would give me the biggest hope. so there i was again, lying to myself, prolonging my own agony, torturing myself. until a fews ago, i faced my fear. we were in her place we watched a movie after the movie we had a serious talk about our relationship. she was still trying to fall back in love with me but she also knew that there was really nothing there. so i told her if theres nothing there anymore dont bother. she wants to stay friends but that would be impossible for me. she loves me but not inlove with me. so i walked out of her house crying my eyes out my face was hurting alot for holding the tears for so long, carrying the bag of chips and dip i bought for the movie(she didnt want them). that night was the night i felt so bad for myself. only a few people know that we're broken up even our FB relationship status says we are still in the relationship. everyone thinks we were perfect for each other. i still need to have my question answered "why/how did she fall out of love?". it gets tougher everyday because i still have that little hope. im trying to be strong and busy to get over my first heart break. its so hard for me to tell people what im really feeling inside. my friends see me as a strong man yet i feel like a little kid inside hoping to be loved. im doing the best i can not to contact her. im trying to get back on my feet and just let things be. i dont know if she'll miss me and come back but i best not expect anything.

for other guys out there: growing up we were always taught to be tough, strong and not to show any kind of weakness. while, girls are taught the opposite they show emotions, how they feel and all girls out there expects to have their heart broken by a guy one day. us guys would never expect that. so when we guys get our hearts broken it would be unexpectedly fcked up for us.

atleast thats how i see why im having a difficult time coping with this.

well i got some out of my chest! thanks for reading