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NeedsHelp

September 12, 2010 @ (WestCoast)

Tags: Tags

My girlfriend of 9 years broke up with me to be with an old high school friend. The sad part is that I have a feeling that they will eventually get married within the next year or so. I’m absolutely crushed like never before. We’ve had our share of problems throughout our relationship and unfortunately it’s mostly my fault. I feel so stupid for taking her for granted.

We met in college back in 2001 and it started out as the most beautiful thing in this world that either of experienced. We were soul mates and were certain that we’d be together forever. It was like we were two peas in a pod, amongst a campus full of strangers and were very happy we found one another. It didn’t take us but 6 months to move in together we were so in love. However, after graduating college, I struggled for years, and was depressed even, to find a job. She supported us for most of our relationship as she was blessed with a wonderful career as an exceptional community organizer, which she now serves as the executive director of her organization. Me on the other hand, struggled immensely to find my passion, and had several dead end low paying jobs.. This was emotionally hard on me, and most certainly on her. However, we would make the best of our situation by taking various trips around the country and enjoying the natural bond we had for one another. We didn’t have to take trips really we enjoyed staying home together, whether we were intimately conversing about any topic or making passionate love. However, my career struggles took a severe toll on our relationship. I even went through a period of alcohol abuse, which lasted a couple of years. Eventually, after 4 great years she began to loose interest in me, and cheated on me a few times. Although I was obviously crushed, I took her back because I loved her so so much and believed we could work through anything, plus I always envisioned her as the mother of my kids. Fast forward to January 2008, I eventually found a job which pays great and I absolutely love-- finally I’m able to support us and feel good about myself in that regard. We celebrated the entire 2008 in the name of my success and life seemed golden--finally my career struggle was over! Unfortunately I started to drink again and lied several times about it and thus undermining any trust left. At that time, she started to give me warnings that I had to stop or else she’d leave. Fortunately I finally stopped, but we would still argue. She also began to voice, starting in mid-June of this year, that she was growing unsatisfied in our relationship and that we needed to talk. I unfortunately kept prolonging “the talk” and became slightly tuned out every time she said it. Beginning of August I noticed she started to act suspect: she seemed to pay more attention to sending text messages on her smart phone than being in my company. So, I naturally had a hunch something was wrong, so I checked her work email and noticed she made reservations at hotel to be with some random guy, the weekend I was going out of town visit college friends in LasVegas. To make a long painful story short, I confronted her about it over the phone while she was at work, she became shell-shocked that I found out and started crying. We hang up and she eventually came home from work. The first thing she said was we should break up… and that I should‘ve talked to her but now it‘s too late we have to break up. I’m begging and pleading for her to get her to change her mind, and that we should talk now, but she insisted we should break up. The next day I go to work, come back home and she’s gone. I call her and she said we shouldn’t be around each other anymore and one of us needs to move out. Now I’m in further disbelief and shock. What follows after that is even more painful drama, trauma rather, and would take another 500 words or so to explain but I‘ll save the detail--it’s bad.. In short, she’s been at a friends house for the past 3 weeks looking for a place and blocked my number from her cell phone, it turns out this random guy is an old high school friend and they are in a intimate partnership. She even hinted that they are talking about marriage. Meanwhile I’ve been alone in our old apartment reminiscing, broken-hearted but refusing to let go, looking at old pictures and her belongings, under an unbearable amount of sorrow, loss of appetite and motivation, deteriorating self-esteem and ego. I’ve been reading passages from Psalms to make it through the day. My life feels like it’s over.

John L.

July 20, 2010 @ (Orlando)

Tags: 8 year dream

I was with a girl for 7.5 months. When we first met she told me that she was going to try and get back together with her ex.8 years earlier I had begged God to show me the girl I was to marry. I had seen this girl and her dad for 8 years in my dreams and had been looking every day. 2 days before my 23 b-day,I took her out to dinner and it was my first date.We ended up hanging out more and more. FOund out later she was with a guy I knew and was having sex. I am a true Christian and wanted to show her that sex wasn't how you loved someone it was just being with the that mattered most. Her ex had messed up her head. I got drunk for the first time forher and apparently I woke up next morning with no clothes on. I lost my virginity.To me it was the most sacred thing I wanted to give my wife to say this is all that I am and I am giving it to you. We ended up doing it a lot and I thought she would stay with me. She was talking with her ex the whole time and I hated that but was trying to show I cared. He came back 4 two weeks and she had sex with him. I had just given her a 200 dollar pair of earrings saying the night before don't forget about me. She came back and we were together for a few months then she started working at a place full of guys then the there was no contact with her. I was like what the crap. She didnt tell me anything. I had nightmares of me being in the room while she was having sex with a guy I had never seen. Later found out she was seeing a guy from work. And that she had finally broken up with her ex.
I said is there any way that we could start over since she now had a clear head. No. She never once loved me or had feelings for me. They were all transferred from her ex to me. Sorry.
In the end I gave my virginity so she wouldn't go to another guy who would use her for sex,gave her my heart, mind, body and soul. I waited 8 years for this girl and she took everything and said it meant nothing. Now I am afraid to even ask a girl out because I believed in her. One time after sex she was like what is your favorite part. aka on her body. I pointed to her heart. I never wanted sex. I kept telling her it was just holding her hand, being in her arms, and looking into her eyes that made me forget everything. Now I fear she is destroying her future. All I can do is pray

Aidyl

October 21, 2009 @ (Minnesota)

Tags: yes I'm crazy

I dated this total loser for a few months and over time he moved in with me. he quit his job in october and announced to me that under MINNESOTA STATE LAW (some winter cold state law bullshit) I could not evict him into the cold. He was rude to my daughter, mean to my dog, ate all our food used all of our stuff, hogged the T.V. blah, blah, blah. So I stopped buying food and my daughter and I ate out every night. and locked our food in her room. He started going to his Ex's to eat. and started to hang out with her. When he stayed gone over night I put all his crap outside in the snow and changed my door lock. When I put all his stuff out I forgot to pack his VIAGRA. He called me yelling "I WANT MY VIAGRA" I told him he could pick it up the next day. I so had to know if the nail polish trick works so I said lets go to the casino for buffet lunch. I was flirty and said "hey I got a coupon for a free room, lets go up and fool around" He popped a pill on the way up to the room. We waited, he slapped it around, NOTHING. "dead as a door knob" after 45 minutes I said I was going to go get us some soda pop. I left him there. About 5 hours later I noticed his truck was gone from my drive way. about 3 weeks later I ran into the mutual friend that set us up in the first place. He told me that "he said he was in total erectile disfunction. He started going to church (pretty much a jesus freak) moved home with his mom and dad and is looking for a job.
I am not proud of tampering with his meds. But I feel great about how it all turned out.

Heather

October 16, 2009 @ (SF)

Tags: sf

It's bad when you find out from Facebook you're getting dumped even before he calls you.

Lara

October 14, 2009 @ (Canada)

Tags: ass, douche, lame

My ex, with whom I have a beautiful daughter with, and I dated for 3.5 years. I moved out to his small hometown and put my university plans on hold so that we could start a family and our life together. After 2ish years of being a stay-at-home mom, I decided that it was time to go back to school so my daughter and I moved into the city (1.5 hours away) while he stayed to keep his well paying job and live in the house that we had bought. He came to the city every weekend, his weeks off, and every holiday that he had from work. We eventually decided to rent out our house and he began to live in the city and commute to work. Nothing had changed, other than the amount of time we were together and my load of responsibilities (which I handled quite well), but he became increasingly aggravated. In April of my first year of school, he confessed that he resented me for going back to school and felt that I had to prove that I was better than him. He broke up with me with the excuse that it just wasn't working and he couldn't be with "someone like me". We remained friends for the sake of our daughter and everything was fine. It wasn't until I had met and started dating someone else that he decided that he didn't really break up with me in the first place, and that he had just wanted a break from the stress of our changing relationship. After this epic attempt had failed to sway me, he proceeded with trying everything possible to sabotage my life (ie. take custody of our daughter, cut off all financial assistance, force me to quit school, ruin my new relationship). Thankfully, everything that he tried was unsuccessful. My daughter is still with me, I am still in nursing school working towards my bachelor in science and nursing, and am in a wonderful relationship with my new boyfriend.

I'm sorry sweetheart, but real life doesn't work that way.