Searching for "anger"

52 Results For 'anger'

Dada

October 19, 2016 @ (Canada)

So there are all of these "my boyfriend did something to me" but this time its a little different, its actually me that did something not very cool to my boyfriend and I totally regret it! It all happened on THAT day, at my friend's uncle small cinema ( about 30-40 places). My friend told me I could bring some friends but only 2-3 since our whole "squad" was there and some other people she knew would come. So I went over there with my boyfriend and his brother and we sat at the complete back of the room, if i remember, we were on the 4th seat from the right side of the alley. So the movie started and my boyfriend went to get something (I don't remember what it was but I think it was food). He left for a good 5 minutes, so I started talking to him (yes i am part of these rude people at the movie theatre) and the more we talked the more I thought he was cute. I then put lip balm on since I am a lip balm addict and I always put some on so his brother told me "you must have very soft lips" and i said "well i guess your brother must be very lucky" and then he said "maybe one day" and I had the great idea of saying "why waiting for some other day when we can do it now" (i know its cheesy) and we kissed... The worst part is that I liked it! When my boyfriend arrived, I bursted in tears and ran to the washroom. I stayed there really long until I finally got out. I told him everything that happened but suprisely he didn't seem to care. I invited for him to break up with me because he did not deserve that but then he said that he wanted to stay with me : "why would I leave you? you like me so much you couldn't hide it from me and you care about me so much that you want me to leave you just because of that." I hugged me and we left the place and went at his house but the only problem and the one thing I didn't tell him was that since the kiss, I developed a small feeling for his brother. At his house, he made a test, he left me in a room with his brother to prove me it was an accident and that he trusted me. Now his brother kissed me and i didn't stop him, i kissed him too, a long and honest kiss. Then my boyfriend didn't trust me anymore... He broke up and we didn't talk anymore. Now its a bit better and we still talk together but not as much as we used to. During 3 months I secretly dated his brother and a few days ago, I told him about it. He was not that mad and he said one sentence I am always going to remember:

- love is like a wild animal, it seems nice but can be dangerous and even if we think we are its friend it will either jump in your face and attack you or run away to someone else's arms. No matter what you do or how you do it, you can't stop someone from loving as long as you can't stop the horse from running.

I dont freakin' know where he got this quote from but I will always remember it! This guy is the sweetest guy ever! he can be so stupid sometimes but is always full of wisdom!!! I really feel sorry and I am really thankful for him understanding my situation!

Dada

October 19, 2016 @ (Canada)

Tags: my fault, i\'m sorry

David Pheng

October 10, 2016 @ (Cambodia)

Tags: Heartbroken Breakup

A month ago, I was deeply in love with this sweet tough guy whom I nicknamed him "Blueberry". The relationship we had was like an electromagnetic force turned into flames and sparks, although sadly it only lasted for a month. It all started in the late summer and ended in the early monsoon. It was the kind of love that was unexpected and overwhelming, and we had no idea why we ended up falling in love at first sight. Meh, you wouldn't believe me, right? Yup, I wouldn't believe myself, either.

I had always thought that the idea of being in love at first sight was "foolish" until it happened to me. He was brave enough to hold my hand, walking in the pouring rain and whispering to me that he'd never met someone like me before. At that blissful moment, I caught him looking and smiling at me dazzlingly, laughing like a little kid. Oh, you know what? His smile was infectious; his deep husky voice kept me interested in whatever he talked about; and his large and tall body kept me safe and warm. I knew he also liked me...and I was happy.

Time passes; feelings change; memories fade; people leave but hearts never forget. We broke up out of the blue. It hurt like hell when he told me he tried to make the relationship work but it didn't, because he made me fall so deep in love with him. It was the moment I knew I'd just lost a soulmate whom I could talk to for hours without any pretense, laughing at his jokes without acting like he was a funny guy (because he was one hell of a funny guy) and sharing secrets to each other. I felt like I'd lost someone more than a close friend, although we only spent a month together. We'd had plans to be done and promises to be made until we found out that we weren't meant to be together in the end.

I would be lying if I said that I was fine going through the breakup...but I guess, it was okay, because I kept reminding myself that all I've always wanted is for him to be happy even if I'm not the cause of his happiness. The combination of anger, guilt, and revenge built up inside me has finally subsided. I admit I was so mad and depressed, leaving him numerous messages and calls...because I wanted him to be there when my heart was broken and fire was burning inside me. I couldn't sleep and eat well for several weeks; I lost some pounds; I looked up "how to mend a broken heart" articles on the internet, yet they couldn't help much as my heart still wanted what it wanted, although my head tried to prevent me from going back to what'd shattered my heart into pieces. The funny thing was I even cried at work when he instantly popped up inside my mind.

Buried deep inside my head, his presence was still there. I saw the invisible him every where we used to go together. As much as I tried to erase him from my mind, I only kept hurting myself by doing so. It took like a month to get better from it. However I'm in the process of healing my heart and bringing back the old happy me, deep down inside I still miss him and wish him all the best. I love him. I still do. But I'm letting him go if that's what makes him happier. Thanks for all the memories which will be kept and locked forever in my heart.

Stephen King once said, "Some birds are not meant to be caged, that's all. Their feathers are too bright, their songs too sweet and wild. So you let them go, or when you open the cage to feed them they somehow fly out past you. And the part of you that knows it was wrong to imprison them in the first place rejoices, but still, the place where you live is that much more drab and empty for their departure."

Allyson

February 09, 2016 @ (NYC)

Tags: Bad Break up, Dominican Moms, Black Girl Problems, Caribbean roots, NYC, Harlem,

I met him while browsing through people I may know on FB. I was 20 he was 19. His name was P. Sounds weird but we began dating before we even met in person 5 months later.
It was love at first sight literally...I've heard this saying and felt it was so corny and not possible BUT i'm a believer.
We both were struggling with our personal lives at the time of meeting so we filled those gaps which made us love even harder. Eventually, things started to decline. When it came to being emotionally supportive for me, and financial cracks he would always disappear. Perhaps after putting in 3 years I thought things would get better but they didn't. It didn't help that his mom was an older Dominican women. She hated that I was black, she hated everything about me. Over time things took its tole.
I recently decided to break things off finally a few days ago and throw in the towel. Not because I wanted to but because I felt I had to. I was physically attacked by his mom and assaulted while he stood near by and did nothing. With a huge open cut on my face, blood and all strangers bypassing were more concerned than he seemed.
The police got involved and he wasn't by my side and it was here when I realized. The person I met 3-4 years ago was not the person I'm with now.
I'll be the first to admit upbringing, infidelity, and insecurities drove this relationship to the ground. It's only been 3 days of feeling alone and empty out of the 3 and half year I was with him. He left me alone and in debt. Not even enough money for me to feed our cat that we got together. Its depressing but I plan on remaining strong.
Not to mention he treated me this way and I'm 2 and half months pregnant. I never understood how men could plant their seeds and not even feed the mouth of the women who carry their seeds. Im going to be strong and will raise this baby alone. He or she will be my new happiness. It break my hear that by law I can't just up and leave and at any point if he wanted to be involved he'd have every right to. Even though he doesn't deserve it. But this is life and the society we live it. So I'll just pray.

Bobby

November 01, 2015 @ (Toronto)

Tags: Tragic Love story

So I can't believe I'm doing this. Maybe some therapy so that I don't lose my head.

When I was about 12 or 13 I woke up from a horrible nightmare that wasn't easy to understand or describe. I was in a sweat and could hardly breath. The only way I could put into words to my parents was that it felt like I had a 10 million dollar ticket and watched the wind blow it from my hand and was gone forever. I feel now that this was a premonition for things to come. Almost like an intense ripple felt through time.

Flash forward 13 years, I'm 25 and I see the most beautiful girl sitting in the lunch room at work. Keep in mind that I'm a very shy type and for just once in my life I through caution to the wind. I had to talk with this girl she was a dream. I think from that point we talked on the phone every night, we had incredible adventures through conversation I felt like I had met my soulmate. Also we had an incredible physical chemistry. Late nights in my parents basement by the fire and nothing else mattered...the body heat and passion was intense, 2 souls coming together and best of all talking about life into the early morning hours. I was a struggling artist you see, working evenings at the shop and trying to make my dreams come true during the days. She didn't seem to care, we were lost in our own little world.

1 year turned into 2, and 2 into 3...and I never lost the passion, every day seeing her was like Christmas eve. Around that time she was finishing school and I was away in Europe doing fashion modelling. God she hated me doing that, being around other women but she had nothing to fear. She was my everything, my whole world and I was just trying to find a way to make life work with the struggles of being an artist.

Years passed and the modelling did not yield the money I had hoped. The girl I loved was growing up, she graduated school and was just offered her first grown up job. At the time I was starting my software company, god damn I wish some days that I could just put on a suit and tie. She was doing great and I can say that I just was not at my best...that's when I'm sure thoughts of children and a white picket fence crossed her mind. From every day after that she grew more distant. It's a horrible feeling of helplessness. Like sand sifting through your fingers.

It's been about 3 years (I think) since we broke up. She has since moved on and met someone else. I was really angry when I first found out, but I'm just not convinced that she would have the life she wants if we were still together. I'm married to my work and she deserves better.

The saddest part of the story? I'm sitting here telling it to you over the internet. I've dated other women, but I just can't stop being in love with another. These relationships fail because I have to end them, it's just not fair for the other individual. Never in my life have I been wounded like this, and the years haven't healed a thing.

It's unbearable dealing with all the pain and anger, but deep down knowing that the woman I love more than anything else in the world would be better off without me....

William

October 29, 2015 @ (Australia)

Tags: Bad Breakup, Funny Breakup

After recovering from a rough two years of isolating heart ache, I finally felt happy within myself. I reunited with my old high school crush, who's company needless to say was pure enlightenment and began to build a strong, trusting relationship. we spent weeks at a time going back and forth between each others homes until my father had become ill and required my share of over night care and regular visits. so my girlfriend would make use of the spare time by going out with her friends reviving her old night life. i was endorsing her late night adventures and encouraged her to have fun while i was away; as i had complete trust in her loyalty.

As it was necessary for me to be away for some odd days of the week, it was common for my friend to regularly turn up unannounced at my home, this time to her welcoming hospitality. This i thought was positive company as he had previously supported me through my years of isolation which ended some few months before.

I became excited to have my relationship compatible with my friendship as i hadn't as much spare time for my friend as i had done during my great depression. though it dawned on me that my girlfriend had developed a noticeable distance that had become to evolve either from the nights out with the girls or to the least of my suspicion my closest childhood friend.

Until one morning on my way home from my fathers house i had thought to stop in to my friend's home with the intention of beginning one of my few days of rest, out with this friend.

Only to find my girlfriend under his sheets, sitting upright by her elbow staring daringly into my eyes as if to spell out the inappropriate deed i had committed by walking into the house unannounced.

Two days later i had met a stranger in the street in attempt to salvage my newly found personal strength. leading me to a small friendly gathering, a gathering of which was attended by my original break up accomplice looking ever so happy hand in hand with her new found lover.

..Aint ..Love ..Grand

Shayla

October 12, 2015 @ (Fredericksburg Va)

Tags: \"Let\'s be friends\"break up

I really thought that he was the one. After 2 failed attempts at marriage and a failed long term relationship of 5yrs and countless miserable dates... He walked into my life and was what I thought I needed. The lies came slowly despite my inner thoughts of knowing the truth that he was indeed married. He assured me he wasn't and we continued what seemed to be a solid connection. We laughed, we shared jokes, we made love.... The quickies and the long passionate kind. Then he dropped the bomb on me that he had 4 kids and was unhappily married. He allowed me to make the decision to keep seeing him telling me that he was soon to get a divorce and said he had been looking at places to live and gave me a date of when he had planned to move out. A plan that seemed like it had been thought of for sometime. I believed him and continued to see him against my beliefs. We continued to get to know each other on a personal level. He acted like he didn't care about anything in his world except me (and his kids of course). I just knew he was going to divorce his wife. Not for me but for the simple fact that he too wanted to be happy and just wasn't in his marriage which happened to be dead before I came along. He traveled often taking me with him but definitely calling me religiously on the trips where he couldn't. Then one day it all changed. The day I said the "L" word. We had only been dating for 8m and I only knew for 2 that he was married. The L word scared him... It scared me but it was how I felt, so enamoured by him I couldn't help it. After that moment the phone calls became lesser and lesser. The good morning and good night text messages slowed down. After weeks of frustration I confronted him. It was then that he told me that he didn't feel the same way as I had felt and that he didn't know if he ever would or could. It stabbed me in the heart b/c I sacrificed so much of me, my morals, my beliefs to be with him. I stopped dating other people and was exclusive only to him. I was happy living in the moment but often times thought about a future with him. He decided that maybe we should cool off and it would be best to stop it now before I got hurt anymore than I already had been. He said he liked me a lot like a lot (his words) and wanted to still be friends. In that moment of anger I wanted it all and if I couldn't with him or have him love me after 8m of daring and sacrificing then we should stop talking all together. I reached out to him a week later. We cleared the air and realized some things were said out of anger,fear and a lot of alcohol but the truth is they were still said. We still talk some but just as "friends" conversation initiated by me mostly because although i know I need to let him go it's too hard to.

Broken (part 4)

April 21, 2015 @ (toronto)

Tags: bad breakup

Three weeks into my still ongoing vacation i get a call from a friend. Says he wasn't in paris with his friends for new years but with his so called ex-wife who is not an ex wife and never was. I feel a flutter of wrongs come back into my stomach. I feel a volcano of emotions. But most of all i feel like puking I puke out everything, the lies, the emotions, the hurt, the champagne, the empty promises, the real promises? I don't know at this point but i keep puking and then i cry. I cry for the lies he has told me and i cry for the two hearts i broke because of him. I cry for the man i let go and i cry for the mistake i have made. I cry for lying to myself and ignoring all the red signs, i cry for believing him, and mostly i cry because i can't and won't let him go. I call him i break up with him. He doesn't run after me and won't run after me. I block him and then unblock him i do this for the next 3 months. once i unblock him i hurl insults at him through Facebook, text messaging, voice messaging. I feel empty so i block him again. I do it again and this time we go back to saying i love yous but then the anger rises in me and i hurl my insult my pain at a screen. So i block him again. I unblock him and so it begins a cycle. I laugh sometimes. My friends stare at me. They used to call me the ice queen now i am the melting queen. I have break downs and melt downs. I can't hurl my anger at him so i hurl it at them whenever they'r ehappy i do it when they're down i do it when they're sad i do it. I don't know myself. The last time i blocked him was 7 days ago today i say its done its over. But deep down i don't know if it is. I love him as a child loves its favourite blanket or as mother loves her unborn child. I love him as if he were the beat of my heart and soul. I feel a physical pain when i see a flash of his smile in my head. I miss him so much that its physically painful to breath. I tell myself it is better to have loved and lost then to have felt no love at all. Then i google and try to find who said that quote and i then i want to find them and murder them. I want to see if they really have loved and lost because anyone who has truly loved. As in loved with their entire soul and finally understood what i would die for you would never ever ever say such a fucking stupid quote. So i go online and i try to find sad break up stories. I find this website but all the stories are about 18 year olds whom portably thing they have found true love. And i think to myself they are only 18 and they don't know what love means. But then i look at myself and i remember i was 18 and i knew love and look where that love has brought me. Which really is nowhere.

Unbelievable

January 10, 2015 @ (toronto, ontario)

Tags: bad breakup, hurt, unbelievable, played, sad

I have loved him for more than 5 years. We've had a thing for almost a year but that never blossomed into a real relationship until a year and a half ago. During that year of us having a 'thing', I couldn't stop thinking about him- he was my first thought every morning and every night. Everything about him I loved, his flaws, his personality. He was someone who inspired me to become a better person, someone who made me become a better person ever since we met. I was stupid to wait around. That year of our 'thing', he ended up telling me that his feelings for me weren't as strong anymore and that I should go off and 'explore a bit' with other guys. Out of anger, out of hurt, I did. My friend chased me. And I decided to give him a chance.

It wasn't long before he came back. Grovelling, crying, begging. He tore me away from my relationship with my friend. And I was stupid enough to have believed he wanted me for real this time. He was romantic and even wanted to be my 'official' boyfriend this time- and he is not the type of person to ever label things without thinking things through. So broke my friend's heart, and ran off with this guy. Everything was great.. until it wasn't. He rarely texts, rarely makes time to see me. He would be so involved with his work, and his gym life. He would spend his actual birthday with his guy friends instead of me. He doesn't feel the want to see me. He got me way too easily. He was so sweet in the beginning I couldn't believe it. I knew it was too good to be true.

On december 27, 2014, he told me he was going to make a big move in his career. When I told him about my point of view, how I was willing to support him and follow him, he told me to really think about it. He didn't want me to go.

5 days later, on new year's day, he broke up with me, saying after the past 3 days of thinking he decided it was best for us to break up. After investing so much in this he decided, after 3 days, to break up. He crushed me. For the second time in my life, by the same person and for the same reasons. He couldn't feel anything with me anymore. He just fell out of love. And after a year and a half, told me his family and my family would never work out together.

I am beyond sad. My heart feels like there's a gigantic canyon on it, in it. Depression is real. This is real.

Enamiran

September 05, 2014 @ (algeria)

Tags: sad

i met him 4years ago ,i was playing second life n i wanted to hear music,i dnt really remmeber wat i typed in google searching for music but the download ended up with a window of strangers talking to me,it is imesh,many ppl from all around th word,i added many frens,from every country a fren,n i added him as well,i didnt imagine that i would b with him but we started talking and we really enjyed talking to eatchother,like to th point when i go back from uni th first thing i do is open my pc n chat with him,n i find him always waiting,2months mater we told each other we like eatchother n that time we just seen eatchother in pic ,he was far away from me,we both liked th idea of having a foreign love,we loved eatch other,my familly knew they convince me to step away,n i steped away alitle,i made my self bz,coz it sounded impossible to meet n have a futur toguether,at first i used to fight with him alot,it was fun no hurts,but just arguing with him was fun,he was so calm understanding kind innocent n sinceer(in my toughts) n after every fight he used to tell me how much he loves me n he cant live without me,he always appologyzed even sometimes for meaningless things,i guess i had a kid mind that time :/, anyway, 2years past n we still in love we use evry possible way to contact fb yahoo skype watssapp,later in a day i was too bz with studdy,to th point i guess my feeling were colden,i was talking to him in video n i told him"i think i dnt love u"!! (stupid me) he cried in that moment,i said im sorry,it's ok myb it's just im bz n my mind is not clair,we can try over toguether i can get back my feelings,6months later,a girl talked to him she said she liked him n he talked to her,she was from his country but not very pretty,he hided that on me for a month ,then he tod me i hide it bcoz i know u ll b mad!,i said ok no problem,i enter his fb ,but he changed his password (he gave it to me b4) i ask him when we skype he liyed on th date of changing th fb password to let me think it was b4 he met th other girl,i knew he was lying by th fb notice" u have changed ur fb passeword on...." i got angry n i cut th call i his face,after that he run to her love ,he shut me off for 3days,colden his feelings,n he talked to her instead,i got afraid to lose him n to lose my self in my exams period so i ask him to try again another chance,we back,but since then he act cold with me whenevr we fight,he understood that he could not lose me ( i my self dnt know if he will lose me one day ) n since then he is th 1 who colden his feelings in our breakups n im th one who get depressed n feel like "omg ,he forgot my love,im meaninglesto him"i dnt wat exactly to do to know my value to him,breakup doent give a clue anymore(knowning that th longest breakup we had was for a weak!!)