I'm 15 years old, he's 16. Let's call him by his initial, D. We started as good friends, and it slowly morphed into something more, like he would say 'I miss you', when I went out with friends and stuff. We had a common friend, my best friend, and he told me that he liked me, I was relieved because I thought he liked my friend. So we were together for 3 months, we rarely argued and it was all good :) But during the winter holidays, we barely talked, and he left for Japan with just a quick 'oh btw im going to japan'. So when he returned, we talked again over Skype, but I realized something was wrong. He wasn't the same. So I asked him if he liked me, and he said he didn't know, so when I tried to talk it through, he just said brb, cos his friend was calling him. Then when I asked whether we could talk in person, and he said he was busy tomorrow. So he promised to talk the day after. When the day after finally came, he said he was 'too tired in the mornings' and didn't even bother. So we decided on 'a break'. Meanwhile, he went to my best friend for support, though he didn't need it. I, in turn, somehow became close with the friend he had ditched me for, on the day that we broke up. During Easter, we got close again. He started making sexual comments, and touching me..but he never once said he liked me. It was all over by the time Easter ended. I had gotten into a fight with my best friend over my actions in the past year, for she didn't like how I had changed with sadness. It hurt me to see my ex making statuses for her like 'cheer up' or 'go online', But what hurt most was, on his steam profile, he said he loved a special person with a description so fitting her and the things they talk about. I don't know what to do, we still talk but it's awkss. I just need some advice.
Tags: Isaac, caroline, me, isaacs parents
we were in 2nd grade when it all started- instantly he saw me and felt the need to protect me ( yeah I know puppy love) I dont know why but that day he asked me to be his girl I said yes, but then on the playground when we were playing star wars something clicked! I dont wanna date yet. I mean i was only 6 1/2 going on 7 ( I was a little behind) this whole thing went on until about 5th grade when we werw getting curious and getting the talk and that he took a shot again at it (he also tries in 3rd... and 4th :D lol.) I said yes and he was acctually a good Bf he gave me suckers from the sales and we even danced together in the 5th grade show (yeah i know- peachy. but i stepped on his foot alot...) He was acting weird, not answering my emails, I saw it coming and was prepared- BUT what he did I was unprepared for!! He finally emailed me that "my parents say we cant date anymore.. :(" I of course thought something was fishy and knew what it was before I even clicked out of that message- his parents wouldnt do that! They were totally happy for us and acctually cool with like everything so i replied with "um... No... they were happy for us. Oh my gosh what is up with YOU?" I sort it out through my head and start crying but am stopped dead in my tracks as my eyes scan at the message he just sent. I couldnt believe it! he had typed "I like someone else, Ok?" I instantly insist that he tells me who it is. im shocked but who he says. Caroline- one of my bestfriends!! he then says "my dad told me to lie to you." I reply with "thx." his words pierce through me "shut up and get over it you *itch!" I am tooken back. how dare he but heres the worst part, then he said "ill use a condom," that was way to far and made me want to kick his ass- that little PERV heck I bet he dont even got equiptment. Now im going into 6th grade and if he messes with me again he will hear from my brother.
Tags: long term relationship, breakup
Question... How do you get over someone who you dated for almost 10 years? It would've been 10 years this year and at the moment I'm really upset. The first mistake I made was dating at such a young age. I was 12 and he was 13 and although we dated right away after meeting, he was my best friend. We've been through so much but never cheated on each other. I honestly thought by next year we would marry. He was actually the first to mention marriage years ago so over the years I believed it would happen. Anyway our relationship changed a few months ago starting with issues at each others home to him being unhappy with certain choices he's made in his life. Now he's completely distant and mean. He treats me like I never existed and keeps saying he wants to get his life together for himself. I get it but he's my life and all i've known. I still love him very much although he says he doesn't know if he still loves me. Anyway I'm just sad and can't understand how things changed so suddenly and I miss him. We still talk but he just hurts me by the way he acts and the things he says.
Tags: breakup advice help
I really dont know what to do.
My boyfriend and I were together for almost 4 years.. we started dating right before junior year in high school. i went away to college and we still made the relationship work. During high school we had alot of problems with him and other girls but we always worked thru it as hard as it was on me. and once college began he definatley grew up and stopped playing those stupid games. whenever i came home to visit from college it always seemed like he didnt have time for me, and would fall asleep on me when we would hang out. a little over a month ago i came home and we were arguing alot, so out of the blue i broke up with him, hoping that it would just be a break to just recollect and realize we need eachother in eachother's lives. i still saw him in my future. after the break up he kept texting me nonstop saying he missed me and wanted me back, but i stood my ground especially cause finals were coming up and i wanted to focus on that at the time. in the meantime, there was a man at my college who was interested in me and we went on a couple dates and he kissed me but right away i knew it wouldnt work out and still thought of my ex so i let him know right away i didnt want to keep dating. my ex found out we kissed and right away and it made him want me even more, but i told him i wanted to start over with him (my ex) and not jump back into the relationship asap. now, for the last two weeks, he stopped talking to me, and i realized i was ready to be with him again. i kept texting him, but he stopped responding. two nights ago i wrote him a long letter explaining why i did everythign that i did, and that i saw a future with him and just wanted to work everything out now that it is summer and were back in the same city. he finally texted me when he got my letter, pretty much saying to leave him alone, hes moving on, and doesnt see me in the future (even though two weeks prior he said he would marry me if he could). i am SO hurt. i begged for one more chance and he said no. i feel like i pushed him away and now its to late, and i am never going to forgive myself for it. it just doesnt make sense how after two weeks he went from seeing me in the future to not. and i saw on facebook this morning hes taking some new girl to a concert and spedning alot of time with her. honestly, what do i do. im so heartbroken...
Tags: Breakup, Friendship, Gay Best Friend
This isn't abnormal breakup story. This is a friendship breakup story. But I was in love and it hurts like hell.
About a year ago I started the job I'm currently at and I met someone there that I instantly knew was an amazing person and someone I was meant to be friends with. Well we did become friends, best friends in fact. Now would be a good time to mention he's gay. Anyways for the last 9 months he was a big if not the biggest part of my life. We did almost everything together. We would text all day every day. We didn't go more then a few days without seeing each other and most of my plans included him or were made around him. He soon became my everything. I didn't care he was engaged. He gave me the love and attention I so desperately craved. And I slowly started to fall in love with how he treated me and then I fell in love with him. But I tried hard to keep my feelings in check. And we had boundaries that helped with that.
Well at the end of February we went to visit our friend at college about 3 hours away. He is also gay. Well late that night things got weird. There was a 3 way kiss. And then there was cuddling, touching, scissoring, and just crazy awkward stuff. But I also enjoyed it because I loved my one friend and I wanted him to be in love with me. But there was a part of me that felt like I was included to prevent me from getting jealous and crazy. I also knew our relationship would never be the same because so many boundaries had been crossed.
Then 2 weeks later that same friend from college came to visit. And I decided I needed a break because I felt to attached to both of them. I also felt like my best friend had feelings for our mutual friend. But he assured me that he didn't. They both talked me out of taking a break and we decided to have a big party with alcohol at my bffs apartment. I knew this was not a good idea and bad things were going to happen but I secretly hoped that with enough alcohol in both of us something might happen. Well everyone got drunk. We ended up making out. But he made out with everyone. It was like a mini orgy. I was physically and emotionally sick. It couldn't be undone and my feelings were stronger but I also knew he didn't feel the same.
The next morning I found out he had lied to me and he actually had feelings for our friend. And that our friend had pretended to have feelings back. When I confronted him he to me said he was embarrassed and thought I'd freak out. His feelings for him confused him. And then he said my feelings for you sometimes confuse me. Something I believed and actually gave me a spark of hope.
From the time of the party on nothing was really the same. We fought often. I couldn't forgive him for lying to me. And my feelings for him were stronger then ever. Being around him gave me such happiness but also brought me agony. I was in love but he was never going to be in love with me. But I couldn't accept his love and friendship. I just wanted more. I pushed and pushed. I expected way too much. I told him every chance I got about my feelings for him. I to him those feelings brought me pain. I was suicidal. I was mean. I was angry. I did all of this to push him away and prove that he would walk away. Even though he said he never would.
About 3 weeks ago we got in a huge fight and I guess he had, had enough. He said even if i was a boy or if he was straight he wouldn't be in love with me. That all the nice things he told me around the time i found out he lied about our friend were actually more lies. That most of what he did day to day was out of guilt and to keep me alive. He told me he couldn't handle me and all that went along with me. He was done.
I was crushed and devastated! He was my whole world. My best friend and the guy I was in love with. It was like the one person I trusted the most ripped out my heart and shredded it. The pain was/is unbearable.
Now that said I realize that our relationship was unhealthy and things needed to change. I knew maybe a break was needed to. But I never expected him to walk away. I would NEVER walk away form him or any of my friends.
So like I said this is a different break up story but a break up story nonetheless.
Tags: Break up
I dont know what to do. Here's my story.
I was friends with him for a year and a half before we got together. Even as friends, I knew he likes to manipulate people's feelings so that they do what he wants. He manipulated me into feeling guilty many times before and I knew he wasn't the man I was looking for. But my best friend got together with a guy I had a crush on and I was never going to get. He was recovering from his recent breakup with someone he had a long history with. So I started to go out with him.
It was my first real relationship (I'm 22). When I told my friends and family about him after a month, most of them told me they didn't like him. Some of my friends knew him from school, and warned me about being with him. I did break up with him because of that, but I also felt bad and ran back to beg for forgiveness the next day. It should've ended right there. But I was lonely and I don't like feeling I've been unfair to him.
Then for the next year and a half, we broke up numerous times and got back together the same number of times. There was never a time we were officially broken up for more than 10 days. A year ago, I told my friends and family after a break up that we were done and I never updated them that we got back together again. It was just too much drama and stupidity on my part. After most of the break ups, either of us would just begs the other for forgiveness and another chance. Because there were just too many times that had happened, I actually made a promise to myself that I won't say it again unless I meant it.
For the last two months, I feel that he's been neglecting me and mostly just spending all his time with the people at his business. I knew he really wanted make it a success, so I had gotten involved with his business too, but not helping him as much as he liked. But I was at the office ten hours a week or more until April when I had to concentrate on my exams. A few weeks ago, I realized that I'm nowhere near the top of his priorities, and he won't call or text me during the day because he's "too busy at work".
The catalyst for the break up was he promised to take me to see a movie, but he pushed it back time and time again, and I, being very considerate, allowed it. But that last time, I told him to set a firm date and time, but he just told me not to bother him about it, he's tired, etc. I broke up with him through text after I hung up. That was two weeks ago. I felt sad every day since then, I cry on and off all day and night and sometimes feel that my life is meaningless. But some days i feel fine.
I care deeply for him. We met up last week, and I pretended that I was normal and told him that we can be friends. Last night, I texted him whether I can drop by his place at night (he lives a 5min walk away) and talk. He told me not to. I guess he was right, cuz I just wanted to see him and see how he's doing. Like he isn't a bad person and I learned to be a better person because of him. I just feel that he didn't treat me right, especially in the last months. Maybe he just doesn't love me as much. But I had grown to care for him and think of him everyday during our 1.5yrs together. I think of him constantly and I get teary and cry all the time now.
I want to tell him why I broke up with him and ask why he agreed (we never had a conversation about this). I want to see how he's doing. I want to tell him that of he just changed how he treats me I would stay with him. I think all this time, I've just been wishing that he would change for me since I knew that him as himself is not who I want (am I confusing you? Lol). He doesn't contact me now unless its about his business or unless I texted him first. What should I do?
Tags: sighs
So me and this girl had dated for about 7 months. The first 5 months was perfect, we were in the honeymoon stage and it was full of love. About 2 months ago, she has this personal problem that she couldnt tell me but I can see a big shift in the relationship. She told me that this personal problem has caused an effect in our relationship and there wasnt anything I she and I can do about it. Things went down hill from here because shes become more snappy. We got into this one petty fight and I walked away because it wasnt necessary. She then later on said something that really got to me, she said that I have no urge to fight and that makes her lose interests and she think she can walk all over me. Maybe its the age difference, im 29 and shes 22 but I dont like fighting over small things especially I already accepted the fact that she is high temper issue. But after this incident, I started having dilemmas with my actions, always questioning whether I'm being too nice or maybe I should be mean. This causes big time withdrawal and I feel like I can't be myself around her most of the time. Since Valentine, we stopped having sex because she has this health issue (i know it wasnt an excuse cuz she has many doctor visits). And then comes the personal problems, she stopped making time for me but rather stay busy with work, school and her friends. A kiss becomes a peck on the lips, holding hands become very vague. The only thing I feel like we truly still had was we still called each other sweet names and quick kisses here and there. I tried to understand and deal with it because I respect her space/time to deal with personal problems. It wasnt easy but I had friends to talk to and helped me through it. About a week ago, we took off on a cruise and the entire time I had to play the "careless attitude" game and to her, I came off as blunt and rude. So be it but I didnt have any more rooms to suppress my feelings about the situation. Then on the way home from the cruise, my ex started venting about her relationship to me (note that she does talked to her ex and whenever my ex contacted me before I always let her know and she said she doesnt care, we have that trust) so I was in a venting mode and vented back. After a few texts, I realized this is wrong because my ex started to tell me if this girl doesnt treat you right then leave her. That doesnt help me, I felt like my ex was trashing on my relationship so I stopped and deleted the thread. My current girlfriend saw that i was texting the ex and later checked my phone but only saw the last part of the message (which said my bf stopped talking to me and walked out of the room, she was venting). To her, this is a dishonest act that I deleted the message, she thinks I have something to hide and she said she lost complete trust in me. I understand where she comes from but I really was deleting the message out of my own guilt and not hiding anything but she doesnt believe me. She said that she has major trust issue and to others this may not be a big deal but to her its a huge deal. I asked her how she felt about us, she said that she doesnt think I can ever cheat on her and that Im the best guy shes ever dated (she dated many guys before but they were all the assholes type so I spent most of my time to show her that good guy does existed and always go out of my way to make her happy) but she cannot trust me after what happened even if she forgives me and broke up the relationship. Ive asked all my friends and they said it was a harsh decision but I need opinions from someone that doesn't know me so please help. I also know that what I did was wrong and I wrote her an apology letter to own all the faults I created but it didnt seem to affect her decision. I just feel very shattered because I spent the past few months to build this relationship and it is now broken over an honest mistake, and accident that I didnt think what i was doing was being dishonest.
Tags: Heartbreak
I started dating this guy about a year and a half ago. We were absolute BEST friends through high school, and going into a relationship seemed like the most natural, easy thing to do.
We're both Christians and agreed to make God the center of our relationship. Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, was like a movie moment. We danced together, laughed together, we even sat and watched the sunset together (yes, cheesy..I know.) I got used to him being by my side all of the time. I depended on him. He was there for me through the ups and downs, and we supported each other through every decision.
He's a football player, and I went to every game I could. We were always at the others' house and his family was like my second family. People referred to us as "Mark and Laura", not just as "mark" or "laura" individually.
People, including myself, always just assumed we'd last forever. I mean, great clean Christian relationship for a year and a half after being best friends throughout high school. What could go wrong?
Last week, out of the blue, he told me that we needed time apart. He explained that he still cared for me, but didn't want a relationship at the moment. I tried being strong in front of him, but went home and bawled. He has hardly spoken to me since then, and he's been talking to his ex (who I've always been jealous of) recently and I literally feel sick to my stomach. I can't eat, I can't sleep, and I just constantly ache. All it takes is hearing his name and I just want to curl up in a ball and cry. ....Advice, please?
Tags: Hearbreak
I started dating this guy about a year and a half ago. We were absolute BEST friends through high school, and going into a relationship seemed like the most natural, easy thing to do.
We're both Christians and agreed to make God the center of our relationship. Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, was like a movie moment. We danced together, laughed together, we even sat and watched the sunset together (yes, cheesy..I know.) I got used to him being by my side all of the time. I depended on him. He was there for me through the ups and downs, and we supported each other through every decision.
He's a football player, and I went to every game I could. We were always at the others' house and his family was like my second family. People referred to us as "Mark and Laura", not just as "mark" or "laura" individually.
People, including myself, always just assumed we'd last forever. I mean, great clean Christian relationship for a year and a half after being best friends throughout high school. What could go wrong?
Last week, out of the blue, he told me that we needed time apart. He explained that he still cared for me, but didn't want a relationship at the moment. I tried being strong in front of him, but went home and bawled. He has hardly spoken to me since then, and he's been talking to his ex (who I've always been jealous of) recently and I literally feel sick to my stomach. I can't eat, I can't sleep, and I just constantly ache. All it takes is hearing his name and I just want to curl up in a ball and cry. ....Advice, please?
I started dating later in life, so he was my first--and this is my first break up.
We moved in together less than 6 months after our first date. We stayed together for a little under 2 years, but things started getting rocky half way through. I was feeling unsatisfied. I wanted it to work, and i would try communicating to him what I wanted. But for some reason we just weren't on the same page. By the end both of us were feeling worn out and unloved.
I was the one who initiated the idea of splitting. Maybe, immaturely on my part, I was thinking that it would spark something and we'd think, "no, I don't want to lose this person", and we'd try some other way to reach each other. But by then we didn't even know how to have that dialogue. It took me a couple of months to actually move out, but after some emotional drama, in the end he was the one wanting me to leave.
It's been about a month now and I can't stop feeling as though we failed, as though something died. And instead of just leaving it be and moving on, I keep feeling like we could have done so much better. I feel like the situation has brought me perspective, and a new sense of awareness of what it really means to be in a relationship with someone. But apparently it's too late. He says he's too tired, that he needs time to himself.
I could understand taking some time to ground ourselves, so reassess the situation. But in my mind I'm daydreaming about us connecting again like we did in the beginning, with excitement and a sense of adventure. In my mind, the second time around would be more wise, more mature. We'd have a better sense of how to approach it.
But he doesn't even want to entertain the idea, I guess. Embarrassingly, he doesn't even want to take my calls. I keep wanting things from him that he doesn't want to give. It hurts me, and on top of that I feel like such an idiot for trying still.
But I don't know how to let go, you know? I don't know how to not remember all the things about him and our past relationship without missing him.
I guess I'm not even sure if it's him I want. Maybe I am just craving a fulfilling relationship in general, and I keep trying to make him fit into that when he's obviously not the one for me.
It's still so hard to not get all emotional. I can go a couple of weeks without contacting him, but then it's like I can't stand it anymore and I just want to hear his voice. ]:
Pathetic, I know.
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