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Chris

October 13, 2009 @ (California)

This isn't an especially exotic breakup, but it certainly broke my back. When I was an intern, I took a weekend call pretty early ... on a Friday night, so the amount of trauma we saw was very heavy (idiots drinking/driving, getting stabbed, etc). That 28hr shift was pretty much the worst night of my life b/c of:

- my first end of life discussion w/a family
- getting my chief to come in was like pulling teeth
- a couple of traumas came in basically DOA
- my medstudent, despite being warned that it was going to be a tough night and that he should read up on diagnosing traumatic injury, decided to read up on wiring of cautery knives ...
- ... then had the nerve to cuss me out for not treating him like he knew anything, despite him never reading, never knowing anything about patient treatment other than pain level
- the floor nurses refused to take verbal orders, making me actually walk up to the floor and write it in the patient chart (no matter if I was in the middle of a Code Blue or not)
- in fact, I got into lots of arguments with nurses about retarded crap
- the next morning, I was so busy in the ER, the oncoming resident had to see all my patients, making me look like a total douche
- I didn't sleep
- I didn't eat after lunch
- hell, I didn't even get to sit down at ALL that night

So I finally get home, almost getting into an accident on the way home b/c of exhaustion, and I get into bed and crash. 10hr later I wake up, still wiped out, hungry as hell, and figure the only thing that can make me feel not like shit is talking to my [long-distance] girlfriend of 20 months.

Well, literally just after I said the words "I don't think I'll ever have a worse night in my life," she cuts me off and says that she doesn't think we should date anymore. I was so exhausted I could barely put up a fight. I just slept for another 24hrs, and didn't eat until 2 days later, when I came back to work. Absolutely heartbreaking.

It was at that point that my realization dawned: being a doctor SUCKS; THIS is what I busted my ass, all my life, my dream, for???